I have a killer migraine and so I’m going to blog a short public service announcement and I hope it’s coherent.

Did you know that March is national chronic fatigue syndrome awareness month, national colorectal cancer awareness month, national eye donor month and national kidney month? March is kind of crowded but I think there is room for one more cause.

National mustache awareness month.

During the month of March, I think every woman should set a day aside to wax her top lip. I know you are all beautiful and don’t have mustaches. Do it anyway. Seriously. Sally Hansen’s microwavable face wax is only 7 bucks at Walgreen’s. Go buy a pot, spoon it above your top lip, wait until it cools and rip. Really, you’ll feel better about yourself and I won’t have to stare at the hairs above your lip. It’s distracting for people like me who have the attention spans of two-year-olds. You could be telling me the most juicy piece of gossip, like author x just got busted for keeping ghost writers chained up in her basement cranking out bestsellers, and I’m not listening. I’m staring at your mustache.

So please, like Mr. Miyagi says, “Wax on. Wax off.”

Update: Don’t use the Brazilian bikini sugar wax on her face. It doesn’t work. Not that I would know.

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