Yup. It’s Hugh Jackman.

Oh, don’t look surprised. You knew it was coming. I only held off because I wanted to share these pictures for FROS the weekend before the release of my first ever contemporary, TALK OF THE TOWN, which should be on a shelf near you this Tuesday, November 18th.

Why Hugh, you might ask if you’ve perhaps been living in a cave in Mimbuctia and haven’t ‘been around’ a lot lately?

I’ll let the pictures speak for themselves. Here’s Hugh from his newest movie, AUSTRALIA …

I gotta see that movie and you should, too. And while you’re on your way to buy a ticket, stop by your friendly bookstore and pick up a copy of TALK OF THE TOWN to read in line at the theater. Just remember, you know EXACTLY what Nick Sheppard looks like.

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For the past two weeks, I have been on a quest to find a cornucopia. Or as Mr. G calls it a “Horn of Plenty.” Personally, I think that Mr. G just likes to say “Horn Of Plenty.” Anyway, when I first set out on the quest, I thought it would be easy, breezy, lemon squeezy. I found tons of gourds and little dried ears of corn. Fake fruits and nuts, but no matter how far I drove in my search, no cornucopia.

What I did find was tons of Christmas decorations. And I confess that I was fairly miffed. I love Thanksgiving. Beyond gorging myself on my favorite foods, I love my Pilgrims and Indians nutcracker collection. I love my wooden turkeys and my acorn garland. I love my wreaths made of orange leaves. In all the crafts stores that I visited in my quest, the Thanksgiving section was so sparse it was truly shocking. I finally did find a wonderful cornucopia last night. It was in the bottom of a sales bin at the last craft’s store I visited. I brought it home and stuffed it with gourds and corn cobs and Mr. G’s fat, red pomegranate. The whole experience left me feeling sad that the country just doesn’t seem to celebrate Thanksgiving like we used to.

Do you all decorate for the holidays? And when did we start celebrating Christmas the day after Halloween?

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As promised, here’s another body part quiz. Mouths fascinate me, as both a writer and a female. They smile, they grin, they quirk at the corners, they purse, they curve deliciously. Of course they also flatten, straighten, scowl, grimace, and snap shut in anger.

To whom do these mouths belong? (First hints: one of them is Christian Bale, and George Clooney is NOT pictured.) And yay, I think I figured out how to conceal the photo names. Hopefully.

1) 2)

3) 4)

5) 6)

7) 8 )

Can you name the men? I’ll give clues if you get stuck. Do you like mouths? Can you tell a person’s character from the shape or expression of their mouth?

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So I was munching on a carrot and reading the news the other day (I’m on deadline, dotcha know) and I found this article about how plants can ‘feel’ pain (Because I’m on deadline, ANY topic looks interesting).

Needless to say, I put my carrot down. Slowly. And backed away. I was amazed that plants feel anything, much less pain.

But even more interesting, scientists have developed a thingee that can actually READ the plants’ pain and tell WHAT’S MAKING THE PLANT HURT.

Seriously, that’s what this article reported (And I remember because when I’m on deadline, the world is suddenly FULL of interesting information like plants, pain, and pain-o-meters). If the plant is in pain because it’s being attacked by a worm versus being attacked by mold, this electronic device can tell the difference BEFORE any symptoms show up.

Freaky, isn’t it?

I bet my plants scream a lot. I have a horrible brown thumb and if I just walk past a plant, it shrivels a little. Wonder what the pain-o-meter would make of that? Am I, perhaps, giving my plants migraines?

More importantly, what will this do to the vegetarians out there? How high does the plant pain-o-meter go and how horrible does it feel to be EATEN ALIVE? I’m boiling ALL of my vegetables from now on. But, on the bright side, I intend on eating more muffins. As far as I know, THEY don’t feel any pain.

On the other hand, won’t all of these pained plants get MAD? And maybe plan revenge? I can see it now . . .

A flaming mad carrot is not a pretty thing. Just sayin’.

So tell me, my fellow goddesses, are you a vegetarian or an avowed meat-eater? Did you know plants feel pain? Will you make sure you water yours more often? And, the big question, will you EVER eat a raw carrot again without locking the Crisper Box before you go to bed at night?

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Welcome to the newest feature here on Mt. Oly! The Goddess Grapevine, where you’ll hear all the juicy behind the scenes tidbits.

Karen and Kim are sitting in the Mt. Oly Cafe (hey, it’s a Full Service sort of Mt), sipping mimosas while Hugh fans them gently . . .

KIM: Hugh, honey, can you fan a little harder? It’s so hot here on the Mt. Ah, that’s it!  So, Karen, I have my copy of TALK OF THE TOWN, and I have to say, it’s so fabulously funny. It tickles my funny bone like pink champagne! I know this book was many years in progress and that you did TONS of research for it.  Very hard, non-anything-in-it-for-you, intense (cough, cough) research. (twirls her little green umbrella)

KAREN: This book is really special to me and not just because I met my guy while interviewing cops. I really wanted Nick to have the authentic tone of a real cop so I interviewed about twenty policemen, which was just fascinating. If you ever want to hear some great stories, buy a cop a cup of coffee.

KIM: And now you’re engaged! How exciting! That brings up an issue I’ve got. Since you’re now engaged, that leaves Hugh for me. Right? Since I’m the Handmaiden, I get the leftovers, right? (winks at Hugh)

KAREN: Hugh isn’t ‘leftover’ material, dahlink. But yes, I’m engaged! It’s amazing, because we’ve been together for about four years now and–Excuse me, but Hugh, dear, would you mind unbuttoning your shirt just one more–Oh yes! That’s it.

KIM: Niiiice! Thanks, Hugh. And could you move a little to your – ah! Perfect! Karen, I was wondering, did you find it hard to switch from your historical voice to a contemporary? 

KAREN: Nope! I live in the real world and my son has been calling me ‘duuuude’ for a long time now. I always laugh when people wonder if a writer who has been writing historically based novels can write a book in a contemporary tone. We LIVE in the contemporary world. We read newspapers, watch tv, catch movies now and then — of COURSE we can write in a contemporary tone! When I write an historical, I assume an historical turn of phrase, but it’s almost like a character in the book and it’s not something I take to the grocery store with me.

KIM: Would you say this is the book of your heart? (picks up another mimosa)

KAREN: Honestly, whatever book I’m working on is the book of my heart. I love to write and the process is part of the joy . . . AND pain, sometimes. I will say however that TALK OF THE TOWN is a book I’ve written a hundred times in my mind because I had so long to think about it. It was really tough to write because of that, though. It was a dozen stories by then and I had to work hard to keep to just the main storyline between Roxie and Nick.

KIM: Very cool! So, that Tundy character. She’s pretty cool; she totally reminds me of someone. *ahem* Anyone we all know. And love? Hugh, could you adjust that loin cloth so it–WOW. That’s just–I can’t even--I mean, that’s–

KAREN: I’ll say it is! And yes, Tundy is a little bit of every sassy woman I know, so yes, you might recognize her!

KIM: Ha! I knew it! (guzzles her mimosa and tears gaze from Hugh.) Where were we? Oh yes! Dare we hope there’s another Glory, NC book on the way?

KAREN: Yes, next April! This summer, the final two MacLean books will be out — In August, Pocket Books will release SLEEPLESS IN SCOTLAND and in September, they’ll release THE LAIRD WHO LOVED ME. Then, in April, the next installment from Glory, NC, which is about Roxie’s brother Mark, and Susan, who is the county dispatcher in TALK OF THE TOWN.

(Gaze locked back on Hugh.) That’s the yummiest news I’ve heard yet! KIM:

KAREN: (Eyes Hugh with a huge grin.) Yes, he is!

KIM: (Chucks a pillow at Karen) The books, NOT Hugh! You gave him to me, remember? Sheesh!

Everyone, make sure to run out on November 18th to grab your copy of Karen Hawkin’s fabulously funny new contemporary, Talk of the Town! AND stay tuned for the next installment of Goddess Grapevine on December 10, when I’ll bring you all the juice on another of our lovely Goddesses!

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Don’t get me wrong, I love e-mail. It’s changed my life in many ways. E-mail kept me connected when I moved 1800 miles cross-country so I didn’t feel so terribly alone. E-mail allows me to conduct business in a few minutes that used to take days. It takes the place of phone calls, Xmas cards, even birthday wishes. I can respond to e-mails in my own time, and my recipients have the same luxury.

E-mail has been vastly liberating, yet at the same time, I think I’ve become compulsively addicted. I check my various accounts a half dozen times a day just in case somebody has been trying to reach me. It’s the first thing I do when I get up in the morning and last thing before I go to bed.  Of course, that also gives me an excuse to check my bookmarked websites at the same time.

And then there’s another downside. The spam, the junk mail, the advertisements for male enhancement products that make me blush. The time sink of well-meaning friends who forward, jokes, blog links, You Tube videos. I’m sure I recently hurt a good friend’s feelings when I asked her to take me off her mailing list because she kept sending me stuff that I didn’t have time to read. I didn’t hear from her again for weeks.

But still I couldn’t live without e-mail! I’d rather give up TV or something else if I had to choose. So I guess I think of e-mail as a blessing.

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I’m missing nutrients, not in my diet, but in my writing. That’s because my TBR pile, pictured here, has gone untouched in the last few weeks. I have been so backed up against a deadline that I haven’t had time to read anything but my own stuff in a crappy draft state.

I realized that when I don’t read and fill the well, my writing suffers. It’s like it doesn’t have enough nutrients and it comes off as flat and lifeless and tired.  I honestly don’t understand how this works, but when I read, my writing is jucier.    It’s not that I am stealing ideas or thoughts, but somehow, words and ideas coming in spark words and ideas to go out, and the creative process gels.

I am feeling starved for words and ideas right now and I have decided that I am going to make reading a conscious effort each day. It may be only thirty minutes, but it will be no less than thirty minutes, and I will strive to get at least an hour in until this book is submitted.

Will you guys help me organize my TBR pile? If you fill out this quick questionnaire, your name goes into a hat to win a copy of The Devil’s Love, my very first book.

Help Julia Organize her TBR Pile!

1. What was the last book you read?
2. What book are you currently reading?
3. What’s next on your TBR pile?
4. Are you burned out on: a) historical, b) contemporary, c) paranormal. (name as many as you like or just say no!)
5. Do you wish you had more a) historical, b) contemporary, c) paranormal to choose from?
6.. How many books do you read a week? (go ahead, rub it in!)

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