I Need an Alias
Nov 26th 2008
Suzanne EnochMy Life As A Plebe
My nephew has recently discovered superheroes (yay!), and I’ve noticed that with very few exceptions they all have alter egos, secret identities and the like. Superman is Clark Kent. The Hulk is Bruce Banner. Wolverine is Logan (or actually, James Howlett).
A secret identity allows you to have fantastic adventures and save the universe and then still come home to do the laundry and take out the garbage. Your real name is what grounds you. The alias lets you fly – in some cases literally. Even the President gets a Secret Service name: our current President is Trailblazer, and our next President will be Renegade, though telling everybody your secret identity names seems a bit counterproductive to me.
I want one of those cool names. Not an author pseudonym, but a secret identity/superhero name. Do you remember the game to see what your Bond-girl (or call-girl) name would be: You take the name of your first pet (or girl pet, if that fits better), and the name of the street you grew up on. My Bond-girl name is Sassy Alamos. Or there’s this one: your favorite candy, and your nearest major cross street. That one makes my Bond-girl name Toffee Rose.
If I were a superhero, I would want a cool name like Storm, or Rogue, or Ms. Marvel. Unfortunately, you’re supposed to figure that under Freudian law, you’ve named your most recent pet after the person you would like to be. Which makes me either Atticus Finch or Sig (after my blue lobster). I am going to pretend that I named one of my finches Raptor. That’s a good hero name.
What’s your Bond-girl name? What’s your superhero name? If you could just pick a superhero name for yourself out of the blue, what would it be?
51 Comments »
51 Responses to “I Need an Alias”
Susan M on 26 Nov 2008 at 7:39 am #
Let’s see my bond girl name would be Dolly Paxton. My superhero name would be Snickers Sawmill. Not sure I like either one of those. I have no idea what name I would just pick. I’m going to have to think on this one.
cail on 26 Nov 2008 at 7:47 am #
we used to play this game all the time! my bond girl name is Aris Paine, and the last pet i named was… Peekaboo Street. Ok, that one isn’t so bad. she was an awesome skier after all (can you tell we got that parakeet during a winter olympic year?) we’re getting kittens soon, and those will be named after the last neighborhoods in NYC that the DH and I lived.
I don’t know what I’d choose as my super hero name. To be honest, i kinda think names like superman and batman are kinda dumb.
Margaret on 26 Nov 2008 at 7:50 am #
My Bond girl name isn’t very Bond-ish. Rosemary Banks. Sigh. The story of my life. Sounds like a nerdy secretary. Maybe I could be one of those that takes her glasses off, unpins her hair, shakes it out and becomes Pussy Galore! That works.
My superhero would be a bit better. Honeysuckle Kinderhook.
There were 2 super heroines that I aspired to be back in my wayward youth. First was Sheena, Queen of the Jungle with her trusty black panther. I even had the costume. A bathing suit and a long piece of brown paper that came off some lumber bundles. The paper was my cape, of course. The panther was portrayed by Jack, my ever faithful, ever suffering brown mutt.
When I was more mature, it was Wonder Woman. Who wouldn’t want that figure and the Lasso of Truth?
Becky on 26 Nov 2008 at 7:59 am #
Oh, let’s see… my Bond-girl name is Garbo Crestridge. Could be mysterious, I suppose, but I’d have to be really sexy to pull that off. Pity.
The other name would be York Yankee. I tried to say it 5 times fast, and didn’t manage it. But it is morning still. That one sounds a little more action packed. I kinda like it.
If I could CHOOSE my super hero name, oooooh…… Jade. I have no idea why. I love jade pieces as far as jewlry goes, I think it is so pretty and yet it has those mystical qualities in the Oriental world. Jade would be a hot mama, but she could kick someone’s trash, too. Yeah, I’d wanna be Jade.
I love superheros, you know? It all started with Robin Hood when I was a kid. True, he’s not a real super, but the whole robbing the rich to feed the poor, make life better for those who suffer, that sort of thing makes him my favorite “super” hero.
Kathy/Cookiedough on 26 Nov 2008 at 8:46 am #
my Bond girl name would be Whisky James.
as for superhero name.
If using your formula, it would be Sweetums Kitty.
I had one WAY before the show came on. little people and their parents called me Super Nanny.
Kim on 26 Nov 2008 at 8:51 am #
hmm, my Bond girl name would be Precious Third.
My super hero is Snicker Madison.
If I could pick a name for myself: Ruler of the Universe.
lol
Kathy/Cookiedough on 26 Nov 2008 at 8:55 am #
oooh, I like that kim! Rulerof the Universe. I’ll be your court jester- I already have the hat!
amy1242 on 26 Nov 2008 at 8:59 am #
My Bond girl name would be Tanqueray Tenth (growing up on a numbered street doesn’t really work well for this).
My super hero name would be Bit-O-Honey GG (living in the country with highways bi-secting everywhere doesn’t really work either).
My next female pet, I would want to name Zeva, from NCIS, but I don’t think my kids will allow that (they are thinking about Cocoa, Tundra or Gypsy).
You all have GREAT Bond/Superhero names! I haven’t heard one that I didn’t like yet! What fun!!
Jessie on 26 Nov 2008 at 9:05 am #
Bond girl: Sweetie Valley (for the pet one) or
Kiss Crossing (for the candy one–this one is my favorite).
As for a superhero name, I’ve never really considered it. I’ll have to think of a really cool one and get back later.
Freshechelle on 26 Nov 2008 at 9:40 am #
Bond girl name: Brandy Coupe, but we lived on a corner so I’d opt for Brandy Arlington.
Superhero Name: Butterfinger Bloomfield – Not super, but it’s got alliteration and it’s yummy.
Choosen superhero name: Queen of All She Surveils, it’s light on heroism, heavy on power.
JudyPatooty on 26 Nov 2008 at 9:43 am #
Oh dear. My Bond girl name is very politically incorrect – Tarbaby El Cerrito! The “candy” alternate is probably better – Tootsie San Felipe!
(What’s with the Spanish surnames?)
My superhero name is either Lucy or Ethel! Bwahahahaha!
I’m not sure what I would pick for my own superhero name. I’m going to have to think on that one a while.
This reminds me of an artist-friend I have who designs jewelry. She has a ring that she only wears when she has to go do something scary. She calls it her Wonder Woman ring because she feels so much braver when she wears it!
Claudia Dain on 26 Nov 2008 at 9:58 am #
Never mind the names, I want a Wonder Woman ring!
Freud was a strange man. I never name my pets names I’d like to be, but names that suit them. Doesn’t everyone do that? Conan got his name because of all the rippling muscle on his larger than normal German Shepherd body. I don’t want to be Conan! He didn’t have any cool jewelry.
Clearly, I am off topic and have lost the point of the whole exercise.
Ahem, back on track, my Bond girl name would be Betsy Bob White. Oh, brother.
My other Bond girl name would be Peanut M&M Six Forks. Even worse.
Super hero name: Mom, though I didn’t pick it, it was bestowed upon me.
SheridanLA on 26 Nov 2008 at 10:26 am #
Jannike Alaska (Bond-girl)
or KitKat Venice
If we went by Freud’s theory, my Superhero name would be Jack.
and I think I would like a Wonder Woman ring as well
Nicole Jordan on 26 Nov 2008 at 10:26 am #
Oh, I wanna superhero/heroine name, too!! But I’m not great at coming up names. So does anybody want to volunteer some for me?
I’d like sexy and fun, please. Barbara Big Bosoms won’t work, however, cause it’s gotta be enough true to life that it could fit. And Little Bosoms isn’t sexy at all.
elsiehogarth on 26 Nov 2008 at 10:30 am #
Suzanne, this is so much fun. My Bond girl name would be: Peppy Fanwood My candy name: Godiva Washington
My all time favorite superhero is Batman/Bruce Wayne. Then it’s Wolverine, Gambit and Thor. One day with my godson, we were watching his DVD set of Justice League Unlimited and there was a character named Jason Blood/Etrigan. I think both names are fantastic. If I could be a superhero I think I would like to be known as Night Shade. Blending into the shadows and the night.
RachelG on 26 Nov 2008 at 11:08 am #
Well, since Alotta Vagina and Dixie Normous are taken, I guess I have to settle for Lady Marmalade–after the last cat. Or Superhero name, Taffy Shearson.
rachelg
Freedom Writer on 26 Nov 2008 at 11:21 am #
For Bond girl name I would have to go with Gin Fizz. My candy name would be Licorice Twizzler. At home I am usually known as Queen of the Universe, but when I don my cape and tights I am known as Most Awsome Queen of the Universe.
Karen Hawkins on 26 Nov 2008 at 11:22 am #
Bond Girl Name: Hughletta Jacksonia
Superhero Name:
I haven’t gotten to name a pet since 1982, when the kids officially took over that duty. Before that, I named a dog Ninja because he was jet black and swift. So I’d be NINJA, even though I don’t wear a lot of black, nor am I very swift.
If I could pick a superhero name it’d be Calgonia Superlative Woman! Yeah, it’s a mouthful, so I guess people would just call me CSW for short.
Kathy/Cookiedough on 26 Nov 2008 at 11:24 am #
candy themed hero name?
um
Cadbury Hawthorne
Suzanne Enoch on 26 Nov 2008 at 11:55 am #
Oh, considering that I woke up and had to battle ants all over my pantry, you guys are doing a great job of making me laugh. *g*
Obviously when I came up with Raptor as my superhero name I was thinking too small. Ruler of the Universe does have a much better ring to it.
I LOVE some of these names! Kiss Crossing, Peppy Fanwood, Tootsie San Felipe, Snickers Sawmill.
Keep ‘em coming!
Yaya on 26 Nov 2008 at 12:00 pm #
My Bond girl name would be Petunia Canal. MMM not snappy enough. or Rocky Road Child. Ithink that sounds a little better. I have to think about my superhero name.
Yaya on 26 Nov 2008 at 12:03 pm #
Suzie–Try baby powder they leave super fast. We get ants here in the house every year during the summer because of the 100+ heat. Since we have pets we dont use chemical that might have them. We line the outside of the house in baby powder and it works like a charm
Suzanne Enoch on 26 Nov 2008 at 12:46 pm #
Thanks, Yaya — I’ve tried EVERYTHING. Just last week I signed up for a service to come spray quarterly. The one spot they didn’t spray was inside the pantry, and that’s where those &^%&* ants attacked. The rest of my house is all ready for Thanksgiving, but the kitchen is a battle zone. *g*
Suzanne Enoch on 26 Nov 2008 at 12:49 pm #
elsiehogarth, I’m glad to see another Gambit fan.
Hey, isn’t KarenR the Skittles fan? Come on, Karen, I want to hear all about Skittles McGee. *g*
Lisa H on 26 Nov 2008 at 1:14 pm #
This is no joke: My bond girl name is Puddles Down
My superhero name is Snickers Hoffman
And my dream alais is Mrs. Depp.
colinfirthfan on 26 Nov 2008 at 1:16 pm #
My Bond girl name is Bimbo River.
Superhero name: Almond Roca Bollinger.
So I was 9 years old. I named my dog Bimbo, much to my mother’s horror, because there was a song about a little boy called Bimbo by Jim Reeves.
Here’s the first verse for all you doubting Thomasinas:
“Bimbo is a little boy who’s got a million friends,
And every time he passes by, they all invite him in.
He’ll clap his hands and sing and dance, and talk his baby talk,
With a hole in his pants and his knees a-stickin’ out,
he’s just big enough to walk.”
…..
My big brother and sister thought it was hilarious!!!
LisaK on 26 Nov 2008 at 1:34 pm #
My Bond-girl name would be Veili Rauheck.
And my superhero name would be Smarties Josefstal. Nice, isn’t it?
Hm, I don’t know. Honestly, the first thing that came to my mind is: THE BRAIN.
And no, I’m not in danger of boast. Nono, never.
Suzie, you have a blue lobster? I didn’t know they existed (so much to “the brain”)…
colinfirthfan on 26 Nov 2008 at 1:50 pm #
Ooh I saw a blue lobster once.
Suzanne Enoch on 26 Nov 2008 at 1:54 pm #
Yes, I have 2 blue lobsters. My nephews gave them to me for my birthday. I think they’re actually either crayfish or big shrimp, but they are blue and green, and live in my freshwater aquarium, where they occasionally catch and eat my other fish. I named them Sig and Phil, after two of the captains from “Deadliest Catch”.
Margaret on 26 Nov 2008 at 2:19 pm #
How big are those lobsters if they live in your aquarium? The smallest ones I’ve ever seen were 1 1/4 lb. chicken lobsters being served up with drawn butter. Yum.
Margaret on 26 Nov 2008 at 2:22 pm #
I didn’t see the candy name this morning. Hmm. I guess I would be Heath Habecker. Maybe I could change that to Heather? I see that I don’t live in a good area for names. You all have a bunch of good ones.
I forgot about Wonder Woman’s ring. I’ll take that, too. But I’m not giving up the Lasso of Truth! I can see where that could come in really handy on one of those dates we were talking about yesterday.
Suzanne Enoch on 26 Nov 2008 at 2:26 pm #
Hush your mouth, Margaret — eating my lobsters! They’re too small, anyway. One’s about 5″ long, and the other about 3″. The big one’s eaten more of my fish. *g*
dbrown3400 on 26 Nov 2008 at 2:41 pm #
Using your formula, my name would be Blackie Urbana, which has a nice ring to it. Blackie was the cocker spaniel we had while I was growing up and the only pet we ever had. Mother had a chihuahua later on, but I don’t remember its name.
The second would not sound so good: Milky Way Veteran’s Memorial Drive. Not very heroic. If I used my own street, it would be Milky Way Somerset which sounds a little bit better.
Since I’m a Cancer and a Moon Child, Queen of the Night is fine with me.
Karen H — Of course. Who else would you be? LOL
LauraR on 26 Nov 2008 at 2:55 pm #
OH yeah, can’t you see a sexy Bond girl named Boots Sun-Mor. heh
Candy name: Dove Dark Cohasset
Superhero…I still like Underdog!
Karen Hawkins on 26 Nov 2008 at 4:19 pm #
Oh wait. I need a candy super name? Then it’d be Turtle LaFoom. IS there a better candy than a caramelly, chocolatey turtle? I think not.
SuzyQ on 26 Nov 2008 at 4:25 pm #
My Bond girl name would be Tammy George, which sounds more like a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader. Using the candy is more like Bond – Mounds Valleyview.
If I had to pick a superhero name it would probably be Jewel – then I could have my outfit studded with rhinestones.
Freshechelle on 26 Nov 2008 at 4:44 pm #
Rachel, those two first names you mentioned? You’re quite the potty mouth. Very admirable!
JudyPatooty on 26 Nov 2008 at 4:53 pm #
Sig and Phil!! What perfect names for blue lobsters!
P.S. I LOVE “Deadliest Catch!” One of my very favorite shows.
Freshechelle on 26 Nov 2008 at 4:58 pm #
KH, twice now you’ve been sweet to respond to mentions of my upcoing move and twice now I haven’t been able to acknowledge you in a timely manner because I was away from a computer those days. Thanks for your interest and good wishes and willingness to be my decorator. Would you please go on the third apt. finding trip for me ‘coz I’m burnt toast by this point?
Claudia Dain on 26 Nov 2008 at 5:02 pm #
Mounds Valleyview??? That is THE BEST NAME EVER.
Suzanne Enoch on 26 Nov 2008 at 5:05 pm #
Turtle LaFoom? ROTFLMAO. KaHa, we totally have to register for the next RWA conference using Turtle LaFoom and Toffee Rose. Snort.
And yes, SuzyQ, Mounds Valleyview is a perfect Bondgirl name. I love it!
Karen Hawkins on 26 Nov 2008 at 5:09 pm #
Fresh, we’re all excited to see you flying high and embracing change! And yes, I’d love to go on your apt hunt for you. I looooove shopping, especially for other people.
Suzanne, I’m there. We will sign up as Turtle LaFoom and Toffee Rose, which actually make darn good stripper names, too, now that I think about it. Hmmmm …. interesting!
Janae on 26 Nov 2008 at 6:43 pm #
Hmm, mine aren’t that great – Annie Olive and Caramel Hawthorne. Since I don’t remember Annie, my other option is Rosie Water, since I grew up on the corner. That’s just plain awful.
RachelG on 26 Nov 2008 at 7:15 pm #
Fresh,
I’d love to take credit for Alotta and Dixie, but they are villians from the Austin Powers movies.
rachel–who loves good potty mouth
Mooslady on 26 Nov 2008 at 9:00 pm #
Ok, my Bond girl name would be either Jenzifurry Keyes, not too bad, or Wolf Lee-Jackson. Can you tell I live in the South?
My most recent pets are a pair of cockatiels named Lemon-drop and Dusty. I think Freud was totally off on that one. The only pet I have ever named after anyone was my rabbit, Paul, after Paul McCartney. I was 14 at the time, which explains it all. All my other pets were named to fit their looks of personality.
I am fascinated that people name their fish. I have a plecostamus whom I have had for years, grown from 3 inches to about 10 inches, but he/she has no name. It is not that I am not fond of him, just never thought to name him.
Kathy/Cookiedough on 26 Nov 2008 at 9:12 pm #
Ant problem Suzie? pour grits on them and they eat it and die.
I’ve heard of that method before. too bad I cannot buy grits here in Nova Scotia!
Santa on 26 Nov 2008 at 10:58 pm #
My Bond Girl name is Whitey Sutter. Sounds a bit English, so I’ll take it.
My superhero name is Tootsie-Nine. Though I do like Paydays……,
Suzanne Enoch on 27 Nov 2008 at 12:32 am #
Mooslady, I also have a plecostamus. His name is Sharky Bug Overflow. Don’t ask me why. It made sense to a 5-year-old.
Kathy/Cookiedough on 27 Nov 2008 at 7:58 pm #
we had a dog in Trinidad that my sister named Dano Twit III.
who knows why but it suited this dog.
TinaLouiseF on 29 Nov 2008 at 9:15 am #
Kitty Addison
Angela on 02 Dec 2008 at 11:31 am #
My Bond girl name would be Ali Pheasant
My Superheroine name would be Dark Dove