Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow
Jul 26th 2008
Sabrina JeffriesOn Writing!
I admit it–I like hair on a man. And I don’t mean just head hair, either–I mean, chest hair and facial hair, too. I adore beards and mustaches, and I don’t even mind back hair. I find men with hair everywhere the epitome of macho. It’s a curse, really, this love of the hirsute. Because everywhere I go these days, men are shaving and trying to hide their lovely rugs.
Imagine my shock when I learned that male models WAX their hair off. I was appalled! And THEN I started hearing readers complain about romance writers who describe the hero as having a rug on his chest. Um, I think I might have done that in my early days. Probably because I, gasp, find hairy men sexy (except that I don’t like handlebar mustaches, whether they tilt up OR down).
Alas, I am apparently in a very small and select minority–female lovers of hirsute men. Aficionados of the hair shirt. Connoisseurs of the chest rug. There’s probably, what, five of us? Maybe six? Though I should point out that Tom Selleck always had serious hair, God bless him, and he’s still considered a major hottie in some quarters.
Seriously, am I the only one who likes a hairy man? Who isn’t bothered by the idea of running her fingers through a man’s chest hair, something that gets parodied every other day on some show or another? Does it bother you as a reader to have a hero with a mustache or a beard? How about a chest rug? Would mention of back hair gross you out in a romance? Where do you draw the line hair-wise?
53 Comments »
53 Responses to “Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow”
Margaret Garland on 26 Jul 2008 at 6:01 am #
My hot button, Sabrina. I have hair preferences. Who knew?
Chest hair definitely. That pic of Tom makes me drool even at 7am.
Back hair. Nope, nada, no way. The King Kong look doesn’t do it for me.
Mustache. Kept clean & tidy. No handlebars or other droops. No grease.
Beards. Definitely not. I like to see a man’s face. And I especially loath the soul patch.
Bare chest. Not nearly as sexy as a good pelt to run your fingers thru. I’m told that romance publishers claim chest hair is hard for an artist to do realistically. I’d think a good artist could do it.
Great topic and a mini FROS with Tom.
Margaret Garland on 26 Jul 2008 at 6:09 am #
OMG. I just thought a very sexy guy with great chest hair! And the rest of him isn’t too shabby either.
Goddesses, may I present Pierce Brosnan? Ta da.
http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://handson.provocateuse.com/images/photos/pierce_brosnan_01.jpg&imgrefurl=http://handson.provocateuse.com/show/pierce_brosnan&h=600&w=510&sz=78&hl=en&start=24&tbnid=WJG0SUt-OeKfRM:&tbnh=135&tbnw=115&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dpierce%2Bbrosnan%26start%3D18%26gbv%3D2%26ndsp%3D18%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN
Margaret Garland on 26 Jul 2008 at 6:14 am #
Even better:
http://handson.provocateuse.com/images/photos/pierce_brosnan_01.jpg
OK I”m done. I look forward to what everybody else has to say. How’s the packing going?
Me, I’ll be off this evening to watch semi-pro football game. My 23-yr old granddaughter is a cheerleader for the Lancaster Lightning. The girls are pretty good. The team bites. Or they did last year, anyway.
LisaK on 26 Jul 2008 at 7:27 am #
Sabrina, great topic!
I don’t care about chest hair (even though Tom Selleck is a bit overkill) or armpit hair (really, that’s a strange thing - I can’t stand women who are not shaved there but I find shaved men rather odd).
But for some reason it - as you say - bothers me when the hero has got a mustache/beard, that’s a big no-no, even though I know quite a few men in “real life” who I wouldn’t want to see clean-shaven (exception from the rule: Reed Solliday in K-Ro’s “Count To Ten”. I think his little beard and the thereby resulting develish look quite appealing!).
Back hair - oh no, please not! That’s … well … I don’t know … simply HAIRY!
Claudia Dain on 26 Jul 2008 at 7:29 am #
I like chest hair. I think it denotes not only masculinity, but maturity. Most men don’t develop any kind of serious chest hair until their 30s, so for me it really does denote the difference between a young man and a *man*.
I can do facial hair as long as it fits the face. Tom Selleck does not look nearly as scrumptious without his mustache. Clark Gable? He’s nothing without the ’stache.
The only thing that never looks right is the soul patch. Ick. It looks wimpy and feeble and usually points out how unsymmetrical the face is. Why go there?
Back hair…not a fan. It’s not a complete turn-off, but I don’t yearn for it either.
Freedom Writer on 26 Jul 2008 at 7:32 am #
I like a little something to run my fingers through on a man’s chest, but the same does not go for his back. I also like beards and mustaches on men. Hair on the head is nice, but NO comb overs please! Hair challenged men can be sexy too.
Karen Rose on 26 Jul 2008 at 7:40 am #
I had to google soul patch, LOL. That doesn’t bother me too much. I do like a beard or mustache when it looks right. Tom Selleck, he looks right. Yeah. And Claudia is dead on about Clark Gable - mustache-less he totally loses the raffish Rhett Butler aura.
DH has a goatee - and I won’t let him get rid of it. Without it, he has a baby face and people will think I’ve robbed the cradle. Last year when he was on summer vacation, he shaved off his beard and all three of us girls in the house yelled loudly for him to grow it back. Plus that goatee is getting a little silver in it, which I really like.
Silver in a man’s hair is very attractive, I think. Of course it just makes a woman look old. Kind of unfair, dontcha think?
Karen Rose on 26 Jul 2008 at 7:42 am #
Margaret, did you say football? Please tell me it’s not that time again ALREADY!
Gannon on 26 Jul 2008 at 7:51 am #
I’m a definite fan of chest hair, which is a good thing since my dh has an ample supply! Not a big fan of back hair, especially when a man has so much he looks like he could braid it. *shudder*
My dh has a mustache and goatee–love it! He’s getting some silver in his, like your dh’s, K-Ro. I think it’s very sexy. And you’re right, it’s unfair that gray hair makes a man look distinguished, but makes most of us women look old. Not fair at all!
Love the picture of Tom Selleck, Sabrina! Without a mustache he does not look right. Neither does Sam Elliot. He’s one of those men that needs the scruffy look.
BTW, I can’t stand soul patches. Really, what’s the point?!
Louisa Cornell on 26 Jul 2008 at 8:05 am #
I agree with everyone on the soul patch. To me it just looks like the guy missed a big spot! Some men just don’t look right without their beard or mustache. I think it is the idea that we fell in love with them with that look and don’t want them to change it.
Personally, I never dated men with beards or mustaches. Not against it. Just not a point of attraction. Back hair - NO THANK YOU!! A sprinkling of chest hair is very sexy, but I don’t like like a shag carpet.
It is completely unfair that men with gray hair are distinguished while women with a bit of silver are “aging!”
Lisa H on 26 Jul 2008 at 8:12 am #
Sabrina I am with you! I love hair on a man, especially the chest. I love beards and moustaches, (not zztop or santa variety) Neat beards and mustaches. I love when a man with dark hair has a beard and you see shades of auburn in it, very hot.
The only thing I don’t like is when men grow a beard without the mustache. I think it looks Amish, which is just fine if you go for Amish men, but I don’t.
Margaret Garland on 26 Jul 2008 at 8:12 am #
I’m afraid I did say football, KarenR. Rest easy tho. The Lightining are a semi-pro summer league. Their season ends around the middle of September. Tonight is their first home game and, hooray, it’s being played in the same high school that Shannon, the cheerleader, attended & Olivia is a senior there this year. Before this, we had to drive clear out to Intercourse to Pequea Valley High School. Hate going to Amish country during tourist season.
Sam Elliott came to my mind also, Gannon. I always liked his scruffy, disreputable look. I saw a picture of him on IMDB w/o the musaches and he didn’t look nearly so sexy.
My BF L’Oreal won’t let me go gray. Therefore, I am NOT aging.
dbrown3400 on 26 Jul 2008 at 8:41 am #
I agree with everyone on Tom Selleck, Sam Elliot and Clark Gable. They just wouldn’t look the same. Chest hair on a man is fine, but no back hair and for my man no facial hair. I guess I don’t like facial hair on my heroes in books either. I just eliminate it from my mental picture. The soul patch always brings to mind Howie Mandel with no other hair–a strange look.
Sabrina, you would love Liev Schreiber. Unless it was a visual disability on my part. I saw him on an episode of CSI, the one where he died, and he had back hair aplenty.
DonnaB (Since we have two Donnas posting now.)
Meg on 26 Jul 2008 at 8:42 am #
I certainly don’t mind a hero with facial hair or chest hair. My DH always had a mustache. The one time he did shave it off he looked SO funny; and way too much like his father!! He swore to never do it again. And I always loved running my fingers through his chest hair. He said it tickled.
Now back hair is another thing. I probably wouldn’t find that really attractive in a romance novel.
Sabrina Jeffries on 26 Jul 2008 at 9:21 am #
Okay, now having JUST said I love hair on a man, I must confess I would prefer Tom Selleck without the mustache. I think it overwhelms his lovely face. But I looked for a pic of him without it and couldn’t find one. I would swear he didn’t have one in In and Out, but I can’t be sure.
Clark Gable, though, I agree with.
And I didn’t say I LOOK for back hair. I said it doesn’t bother me. It really doesn’t.
The soul patch doesn’t bother me either. And I really adore the scruffy look all the actors seem to be wearing lately. I love scruffy!
Sabrina Jeffries on 26 Jul 2008 at 9:23 am #
Ooh, Lisa, I agree with you on the beard but no mustache look. It’s very odd to me.
Judy F on 26 Jul 2008 at 9:26 am #
I love chest hair on a man makes them look manly and I don’t feel like I am lusting after a young boy. My niece is 19 and she can’t stand any type of chest hair on a man. Maybe its an age thing. I don’t know. I don’t like a lot of back hair kinda gross.
I am with you all on the soul patch thing. I just don’t get it. I don’t mind mustaches and well trimmed beards.
Yup its not fair that men look better with gray when we pay big bucks to color our gray.
Sabrina Jeffries on 26 Jul 2008 at 9:27 am #
I should also add that I would never put back hair in a novel. I’m wise enough to know how little women like it. *G*
My husband keeps threatening to shave off his beard, and I won’t let him. He really looks better with it. He has a very prominent chin and the hair sort of evens that out. My opinion, anyway.
Sabrina Jeffries on 26 Jul 2008 at 9:28 am #
One funny thing–my husband didn’t freak out at all when he went gray. He freaked out when he got gray chest hair. That alarmed him. I confess that I didn’t really see the difference.
Suzanne Enoch on 26 Jul 2008 at 10:11 am #
I don’t mind a light dusting of chest hair, but anything that could be described as a “pelt” is just too much. Back hair, dear heavens, no. Facial hair, I think depends on the face.
I remember something about the movie studio demanding that Kevin Costner’s pic on the poster for “Dances With Wolves” NOT have his mustache, because the movie would perform better if he was clean-shaven in the publicity stuff.
cail on 26 Jul 2008 at 10:30 am #
i love facial hair. love it. nearly any kind does it for me. although one of my exes did a chin strap and i thought that looked rather silly. dearest has a lovely full beard, which as any of my dear facebook friends could see, makes him look very piratical (i can’t believe firefox is accepting that as a word, and yet doesn’t accept facebook or firefox!) and to be honest, anything remotely pertaining to a pirate, does it for me.
chest hair, yes. back hair. uuuuuuuuugh. no. i really don’t like it.
Lisa H on 26 Jul 2008 at 10:32 am #
This is very very bad of me…but I love that line of hair that begins at the bellybutton and travels to the amusement section!
Whew, its getting hot in here…where’s my husband?
SheridanLA on 26 Jul 2008 at 11:16 am #
Lisa H.. that is called a treasure trail
I am fine with chest hair, goatees, mustaches, etc.. IF it fits the man. and not out of hand… the only time I have a bit of a problem with it even if it looks good is it can rub the skin whilst kissing.. but then it was worth it (hopefully!) so I am ok with it.
Back hair.. I can’t say I go for it and would not list it as something that I gotta have in a man.. but if I am dating someone and he has back hair (ok, hopefully not a ton) then I am ok with it.. I mean, it is not like he can help that.. it is how he was made.
Women are now expected to wax and shave everything.. sad that men are following.
SheridanLA on 26 Jul 2008 at 11:21 am #
Cail… facebook and firefox are company names, not real words, they are proper names of companies.. where piratical is an adjective… which is why it passes the spell check.
LisaK on 26 Jul 2008 at 12:07 pm #
Lisa H, good that you mention this very special line, I almost forgot about it.
That reminds me of my holidays in Holland two years ago when I stayed at a friend’s. She’s had these calenders with a naked man for each month for years and every 1st January she pinned all the posters of the past year on her ceiling. Now as it happens the airbed I slept on lay directly under a poster where you could see an extremely well-built man’s torso and a nice treasure trail, as Sheridan calls it. What shall I say, my sleep was alarmingly restless…
Judy F on 26 Jul 2008 at 12:17 pm #
My bil has a beard and he shaved it off once. he looked about 12. He has such a baby face that without the beard he doesn’t look old enough to be in business meeting. So he says.
Karen Hawkins on 26 Jul 2008 at 12:24 pm #
Treasure trail - BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Never thought to see that phrase on this blog although … why not?
I love Salt N Pepper hair, chest hair, and oh yes, a thick hair of head, too, although I’ve seen some shiny domes that made a good case for that, too.
Not so much on the back hair. A little’s ok. A lot’s not.
Chest waxing for men — gack. That’s a NO.
Beards, fine but neatly trimmed and the same with moustaches. Gotta keep it real, m’dears!
You know, at the risk of sounding like Professor Higgins, why can’t a man look like a man?
Margaret Garland on 26 Jul 2008 at 12:45 pm #
Treasure trail? Amusement section? I never heard of those either. You folks are cracking me up today. Even if I can’t e-laugh like KH does. *See Margaret laugh. Laugh, Margaret, laugh*
In one of the last 2 seasons of Dancing with the Stars, one of the guys got a chest wax so he’d look better with his shirt undone to his waist. Huh? They showed it right there on tv, people. It looked painful. I can’t remember who.
My vote goes to Cameron Mathison. He is adorable either way. I must admit he looked hot with all those buttons missing. And, just to ice the cake, he talked about his wife & kids often. How much he loved them and how hard it was to be away from them for so long. What’s not to love about a guy like that?
Margaret Garland on 26 Jul 2008 at 1:53 pm #
I tried to send this early this morning, but it was held up. I forgot and sent it from Google. It WAS early. I hope this goes thru. If not, I give up.
Pierce Brosnan with a pelt worthy of the name. Makes my fingers itch.
http://media.photobucket.com/image/pierce%20brosnan/yassmeen/Celebrities/pierce_brosnan_01.jpg?o=155
Sabrina Jeffries on 26 Jul 2008 at 1:57 pm #
Love the Treasure Trail!!! Reminds me of a line from Judith Ivory’s THE PROPOSITION where she says the hero’s hair trail reminds her of an arrow that says “This way to the widge.” I still love that line. Great book, too.
You know, I like it when underarm hair is mentioned in a book for a guy. I think it’s for the reasons some other people have said–it reinforces the idea of how different men are from women, since most American women do shave.
Sabrina Jeffries on 26 Jul 2008 at 2:06 pm #
Now THAT, Margaret, is a luscious pic of Pierce Brosnan. Yum!
Speaking of which, recently I looked him up on Wikipedia and was surprised to learn what an amazing guy he is in his private life, too. I’ve always been a fan, but when you read a line like this, “during his first wife’s terminal illness, he withdrew from acting to be with her,” you have to be impressed.
And after his wife died (in this age of old guys marrying young, he’d married a woman 5 years older than he was, with two kids), he later married a journalist only ten years younger than he is, which is pretty amazing given that he could probably marry a 20-year-old ingenue if he wanted. He and his present wife do all sorts of charity work. Now THAT’s a hero!
Margaret on 26 Jul 2008 at 3:10 pm #
Yes, I remember when Brosnan’s wife was going thru the cancer. And he did, indeed, withdraw from his career to take care of her. I also remember a wonderful picture of him cuddling their son when he was born. Baby Sean
was naked and Pierce was bare chested. I think it was on the cover of Life magazine or one of those. It was heart melting.
I think it’s great that he’s only married twice. And amazing that it was 10 years in between. He is a remarkable person.
Paula on 26 Jul 2008 at 3:29 pm #
Margaret I was drooling whenI saw that picture of Pierce, I love him and could sit and look at his picture all day!
I like men with a bit of chest hair (not too much) and as some have said with a treasure trail! Back hair is a big NO.
Why do men think it is sexy to shave or wax their body hair? I don’t understand why they do it.
My friend says she isn’t going gray but is going blond!
Margaret on 26 Jul 2008 at 3:30 pm #
I blame you all for this. Talk about procrastination. I started off looking for guys with chest hair. Ended up creating a new page on my blog for hot guys.
*sigh* I’m sure there must be something else I need to be doing.
If you care to see wh I’ve been messing around with this afternoon, take a peek. Select “Guys to Love”. I’m not through yet. Just tired.
http://home.comcast.net/~cookeemama/site/?/home/
I’m off to get dressed for the football game this evening. I think I’d better take a brolly. It’s getting dark out there. The story of my sports fan life.
Nicole Jordan on 26 Jul 2008 at 3:49 pm #
I agree, I like chest hair! But my last editor didn’t, so I had to make a lot of my heroes smooth chested or at least not mention chest hair. Legs are finew with me too.
Beards and mustaches not so much. At least not on heroes. And back hair, yech. *grin*
Margaret Garland on 26 Jul 2008 at 4:11 pm #
Good grief! I must be tireder than I thought. I meant I was adding a new page to my web pages. Not my blog. Duh.
Enjoy the view. I did. Any recommendations?
Nicole, I like male leg hair, too. I just don’t care for the waxed/shaved/bare bod look that seems to be popular now.
Kathy/Cookie on 26 Jul 2008 at 4:20 pm #
I like chest hair…and love the term treasure trail! lol
never heard of it before!
My B-I-L has a beard and moustache
here he is at Christmas with his beloved only grandchild-so far- Hunter
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=348017&l=ae7e8&id=514263316
you can see the rest of the album too -my family is lots of fun!
when Hunter’s dad James was very little Kevin shaved off all his facial hair. My sister joked that it was Uncle Darrell coming down the stairs. James called him Uncle darrell all day, not recognizing his own dad with out facial ahir! hahaha
Sabrina Jeffries on 26 Jul 2008 at 4:29 pm #
Kathy, your BIL looks a lot like my husband! Same kind of beard and mustache and hair. One of these days, when I get my site redone, I’ll have a good pic of my hubby up there. I think he’s handsome, but I’m biased.
Margaret, your taste in hot men is a lot like mine, apparently. Those were all great pics! And how cool that you knit. My sister quilts, and I USED to knit, but haven’t done it in years. No time. I do very occasionally bead, but only when I really need something to match an outfit. *G*
Paula on 26 Jul 2008 at 4:33 pm #
Margaret ,phew, having looked at the pics on you r site i really need to go get a cold shower to cool down!
Sabrina and Margaret I knit occassionally as well, i had tio learn when I was in college. My left handed 7 year old wants to learn but I’m not sure how that will work.
Sabrina Jeffries on 26 Jul 2008 at 4:35 pm #
I never saw that pic of Pierce and his son, so I went looking for it, and lo and behold, his son is grown and is now an actor himself! Sheesh, I feel old.
Kathy/Cookie on 26 Jul 2008 at 4:57 pm #
And really, has any gal said in all honesty or seriousness…”I love to run my hands through his manly back of hair”
gag
PJane1031 on 26 Jul 2008 at 6:01 pm #
I think I’m pretty much with the consensus in that I don’t mind chest hair, but back hair needs to be not as prevalent. Mustaches and soul patches really don’t bother me, but the full beards aren’t my cup of tea!!
Oh, and Margaret, on DWTS, it was Jonathan Roberts (the pro) when he was paired with Heather Mills who has his chest waxed. OUCH!!
Meg on 26 Jul 2008 at 6:57 pm #
Oooo. Loved the picture of Pierce Brosnan. Talk about mini FROS.
I had never heard of it called the “treasure trail.” Around here it’s always been called the “Happy Trail”. In my opinion, a trail by any name is sexy!
Kathy/Cookie on 26 Jul 2008 at 7:11 pm #
completely off the hairy topic , but my pc is fixed! hurray! my wiz of a nephew James just left after taking it all apart and doing what needed to be done! it was shutting off and not being very co-operative.
James and Shauna brought 2yr old Hunter along so I could spoil him and them with brownies and toys.
Margaret Garland on 26 Jul 2008 at 9:48 pm #
Sabrina, I’d give knitting & qulting in a flash to have your talent for writing.
BTW, did you know Elizabeth Boyle is a knitter? She has 2 separate blogs. One as an author and the other for her knitting. She does some nice thing. She doesn’t post there often, but I like what she does.
Her knitting blog is Knit the Stash
http://knitthestash.blogspot.com/
And thanks for checking out my guys. I have a whole new respect for KarenH and her FROS. Hat’s off to ya, babe.
Sabrina Jeffries on 26 Jul 2008 at 9:53 pm #
Thanks, Margaret! I didn’t know Elizabeth knitted. Did you know she too has an autistic child? We always compare notes every conference.
J Perry Stone on 26 Jul 2008 at 10:06 pm #
I have a long history with hair on men. In fact, I’ve never actually seen my own father’s face and I’ll be 36 the day after Karen H’s birthday. Apparently he has a cleft chin, but who can be sure?
And I think my husband had a mustache at like, 12. He’s clean-shaven now, but with a nice pelt of black chest hair.
So sing it, Sabrina! I’m all for chest hair. Whoever said it shows masculinity and maturity was dead-on. Besides, I don’t like smooth model-chests because, in my head, these are the boyfriend types that knock you out of the way to get more mirror time for themselves.
Ellen on 26 Jul 2008 at 10:47 pm #
My sweet DH is a living chia pet. I water him regularly, and he continues to be all manly, fuzzy and hot.
I especially love his goatee…it tickles.
Lori on 26 Jul 2008 at 11:34 pm #
Ummm, back hair? Seriously? Yeah….no. I’ll pass. I admit, I’m not much for facial hair either. Or long hair. I don’t mind a bit of chest hair, though (a no-hair chest is a bit weird, dontcha think?). Am I a bit too conventional?
Shashi on 27 Jul 2008 at 5:47 am #
Hair on the head? Fine. Anywhere else? Not necessary!
I’m delighted that my man (Bosnian/Albanian mix, not sure if that has anything to do with it?) is *naturally* not one of these man-hair-beasts that I have been hearing about. It’s just not for me, but whatever floats your boat, right? I like a bit, but not alot. I guess I like whatever comes naturally. However, I think that it’s best to just stick with whatever comes naturally…I prefer not to wax myself, and encouraging a man to do it would just seem unfair
Oh, and if an author chooses to describe the dashing protagonist as having a patch of fur on his chest (or anywhere else for that matter), I choose to ignore that piece of information
xoxo
Sabrina Jeffries on 27 Jul 2008 at 1:45 pm #
Shashi, apparently you’re not alone in ignoring what you don’t like! That’s a good philosophy, since no one is ever going to have everything you want in a book.
Ellen, I too am married to a chia pet. Yay for chia pets!
Nice to know I’m not alone in disliking the waxed chest look.
cindi on 27 Jul 2008 at 10:11 pm #
I love long hair on men, but don’t want to see very much again until the happy treasure trail! But I’ll take Pierce &/or Sam however they want to show up on my doorstep . . . . Overall I think I’m surprised how many of you ladies don’t mind hair — based on what is prevalent in fiction today I’d think no one likes it. I guess I never thought of ya’lls editors saying, “What a wonderful new book, (fill in Goddess’s Name), if you would just cut out some of the chest hair” …
anneriailin on 28 Jul 2008 at 11:11 am #
I’m a little late in coming to the party, but I wanted to add my 2 cents worth in. I love a hairy man! I love hair on the chest, back and from the waist on down. And I love a man with facial hair. With that said, I guess I should qualify that. I love a man that has ‘traditional’ facial hair. A moustache, goatee and beard. The soul patch to me looks like the guy forgot to wipe his mouth after dribbling something on his chin. And what does David Ortiz of the Boston Red Sox have on his face? I can’t figure out what he’s trying to do, but it just looks funny to me. Ah well….to each his own, I guess.
–dorothy