Thinking outside the (gift) box
Dec 17th 2007
Karen RoseOn Writing!
It’s the season for giving and receiving, and I LOVE that part of Christmas. I love the smile on a person’s face when I choose the exact right gift. I love picking up the box with my name and wondering what’s inside. I love the look on my husband’s face when he sees how pleased I am with his gift and he says … (wait for it, wait for it…) “And it was a bargain at 50% off!” Somehow that makes his experience 200% better, LOL.
Recently, though, I had cause to pause and think about the gifts that don’t come in boxes or from stores. If I may quote the unforgettable Dr. Seuss …
“Maybe Christmas,” he thought, “doesn’t come from a store. Maybe Christmas… perhaps… means a little bit more!”
So thinking outside the gift box, here 
are just a few of the gifts I’m thankful for: My youngest daughter got an A on her science fair project (this is huge). My oldest daughter has had some health problems this year and after some physical therapy, is no longer experiencing excruciating back pain. And I always am grateful for every year I have with my sweet husband. There was a time I wasn’t sure how many more of those I would have, so now, even though the anxiety over his health is gone, the joy of each day remains.
I’m blessed with good friends who know me and love me anyway and the priviledge of doing 
what I love and being able to support my family at the same time. I’m blessed with fabulous readers who gave me my first NYT bestseller this year. (Thank you SO MUCH everyone!) And of course, I’m blessed with a vacation condo here on Mt.Oly where I can sit and chat with you Goddesses!
All gifts that don’t come from a box.
So what gifts have you received that didn’t come in a box or from a store? For you, what makes the holiday season mean “just a little bit more?”
58 Comments »
58 Responses to “Thinking outside the (gift) box”
ilovetoread on 18 Dec 2007 at 5:28 am #
Like you, KarenR, I’m grateful with each and every minute I have with my husband who has also had on-going health problems. I’m also blessed with three children who have their goals and ambitions, as well as a very modest desire in clothing! (Yippee, no bagging bottoms, no low-cut tops or bottoms for my girls!) My oldest daughter was supposed to walk with a limp, she runs like a gazelle and is finishing college — one semester left! YES!! My younger daughter was given up to die by doctors 4 times before she was 2 months old. She’s now 17 and wanting to go into a medical field. She also has no current health problems although several were forecasted by doctors! My son is now 14 and is playing high school baseball. He and my younger daughter were both premies and both have very bright futures ahead of them. I wake up each morning grateful that I have my own family, as well as my parents and in-laws, etc. It’s things like this that makes a holiday season all year through.
Ellen on 18 Dec 2007 at 7:15 am #
Your post is lovely, Karen. It reminded me of how precious our loved ones are year round. I know this holiday should be a sad one for us, as Jim’s Dad passed away Thanksgiving morning. However, like you, this has just reinforced what a treasure every day is that we have together.
Ellen on 18 Dec 2007 at 7:22 am #
ilovetoread: I actually train the nurses who work in the NICUs. I teach them how to position the little ones so that they can go on to live normal and productive lives. I emphasize Developmental Care issues (womb like environment) and go to bed every night knowing I’m contributing to someone’s life. Your children are walking miracles.
Karen Rose on 18 Dec 2007 at 8:04 am #
Oh, how very beautiful! I’m all teary.
Ellen, what a phenomenal career you have. I didn’t know that’s what you did. Now every time you say you’re going “on the road,” I’m going to feel very, very good - for the parents of those babies. You’re good people, girl.
I have a very good friend who used to work with NICU babies. I don’t know if I’ve ever told her how proud I was (and am) of her.
LoveToRead - you must be so proud of your kids! And no sagging pants! The world blesses you
I used to teach high school and every so often had to truly tamp the urge to go yank up their pants. Please. Ew.
ladydawgfan on 18 Dec 2007 at 8:11 am #
ilovetoread and Ellen,
My sister’s twins, my niece and nephew, were born at 28 weeks gestation. They spent the next two months in the NICU waiting until they were strong enough to come home. Both were RDS babies, now only my nephew has any signs of asthma. My niece weighed 2lbs9oz and dropped 6 oz. My nephew weighed 3lbs2oz and dropped to 2lbs10oz. We spent that summer scared to death for them and praying hourly for their survival. The NICU staff was wonderfully compassionate and caring.
Today, they are happy and healthy 14 year old high school freshmen. Both are normal height and weight. And I still thank God for them every time I see them. They are walking talking proof of God’s miracles, and the wonders of medical advances.
cail on 18 Dec 2007 at 8:14 am #
on Monday morning, the entire side of my dads family will hop on a sleigh and go riding through the snow. the moments there, that evening (christmas eve) and the next day are priceless.
Karen Rose on 18 Dec 2007 at 8:21 am #
Cail - fun! (and cold). So, is this a horse-drawn sleigh, or perhaps pulled by yesterday’s Harley Santa?
Kim on 18 Dec 2007 at 8:39 am #
Karen–what a great blog and the reminder I totally needed right now!
1. We just found out last week that my dad might die soon. He has an inoperable condition and is in very failing health. I didn’t grow up with him and didn’t know him until I was an adult. Since I got the news all I’ve done is mourn what I didn’t have with him. Now I’m trying to be grateful for what WE HAVE had together. I’m grateful that we chat on the phone and that I inherited his sweet tooth because we love to sit for hours and compare candies and deserts. It may not be much but I’ll take it and cherish it!
2. After what seemed like a lifetime of slaving away at jobs I hated I’m SO incredibly grateful that I do what I do. I love it and everyday I wake up and give thanks for it. There is something amazing about loving what you do.
SnikWhite on 18 Dec 2007 at 9:54 am #
Celebrating my grandfather’s 85th birthday with him. Helping a couple who fell on some hard times from our church, by furnishing their new house and preparing Christmas for them complete with a tree and presents under the tree before they ever cross the threshold. Watching my neices and nephew in their Christmas play that ended with a performance that left half the room in tears. Watching my daughter play an angel in her Christmas Cantata take a bow and light up when she heard her mother hollering like a caged monkey in the audience. Being whisked away to God knows where tomorrow by my best friend KariE for a little mom only christmas fun. Looking back on a year filled with some not so great memories and realizing that the good has totally outweighed the bad and that I am a truly blessed woman. Dr. Suess knew what he was talking about.
Julia London on 18 Dec 2007 at 10:00 am #
Totally selfish of me — but I finished the %*(& book!
Kim on 18 Dec 2007 at 10:06 am #
YAY Julia! And not selfish at all because we’re all going to be gobbling it up;)
Ellen on 18 Dec 2007 at 10:20 am #
Not selfish at all Juzie. You have done an act of kindness for all of your dedicated readers. I am so proud to be one of them now!
You just reminded me of something Karen said about her cute daughter pronouncing words the way they read. When ever is see the word viscount my brain pronounces it incorrectly…but nobody knew this until now.
ct009ct on 18 Dec 2007 at 10:25 am #
Karen, though I have never read any of your books (don’t read contemps), I have read all your blogs here on Mt. Oly and enjoy them quite a bit. Todays is no exception, great topic.
Perspective is such a wonderful thing, isn’t it?? But I’m not to fond of how we come by it sometimes. My husband also had some health issues that make me thankful for his presence (sp). Even when he makes me angry enough to want to pull out his remaining hair - in the back (sometimes way back) of my mind I hear “Aren’t you glad he’s here to make you ssooo mad.” So today (like every day) I am thankful for:
My husband who makes me mad at times
My children who make me nuts at times
My grandchildren who try to drive me crazy at times (having taken over where their parents left off)
A roof over our head and food on the table. Everyone is reasonably healthy for their age. Everything else is gravy!
(Dang it, there’s a tear in my coffee - sorry)
ct009ct on 18 Dec 2007 at 10:27 am #
Julia, aren’t selfish moments wonderful!!!!
I love them!!!!! I’m thinking of having one myself. (I hope your new book is a historical)
Sabrina Jeffries on 18 Dec 2007 at 10:28 am #
Since I HAVEN’T finished my novella, Julia, your post makes me jealous.
My best gift this year is (are?) the gains my son has made. He’s talking more, he’s doing things on his own, he’s requiring a few less prompts–all good things for an autistic teen.
There’s my WONDERFUL writer girlfriends, Caren, Deb Marlowe, Liz Carlyle, and Claudia Dain, who keep me sane.
Also my non-writer girlfriends Ursula and Carlota, who make me laugh (Ursula has a few books out, so I guess she’s a writer, but she’s mostly an artist, so that counts as a non-writer doesn’t it?). And I couldn’t survive without Suse.
My cozy Christmas plans for time spent just with the dh and my son. We’ve spent a great deal of time with my family this year, so I’m ready for a holiday with just the three of us.
Hitting the NYT top 15 for the first time this year. I never dreamed I would get there, so it was very sweet. And I’m especially grateful for the readers who put me there. Thanks for a great year, all of you!
Marie Conley on 18 Dec 2007 at 10:37 am #
All of these things are so sweet. I guess what makes Christmas more for me is my Mom. If I didn’t have my Mom my life would be empty. She is the one that made me strong, the one that has taught me that God will never you more than you can handle.
Karen Hawkins on 18 Dec 2007 at 11:25 am #
What a lovely posts! I feel doubly blessed to be near so many mirace givers and recipients!
I am grateful this Xmas for 1) my kids - they make my heart smile and 2) my DH (Dear Heart) who has been a wonderdul addition to my life, and 3) finding such an awesome career. I adore what I do for a living and know how fortunate I am.
Oh and I am also glad for hitting the NYT top 15 as well! It’s been a stellar year!
SuzyQ on 18 Dec 2007 at 11:27 am #
The best gift I get is when I walk out of my doctor’s office with a clean bill of health after my yearly visit!!! I also love the gifts of hugs and kisses from my two kids and when they say “I love you mom” just because they felt like saying it. And of course, my dh who also happens to be my best friend. To me, the holidays are all about gathering with family and friends. Sometimes, that’s the only time of year we get to spend time with them.
Ellen - I do the same thing with viscount!
DebMarlowe on 18 Dec 2007 at 11:27 am #
Lovely post, Karen! I am so happy for you and your family.
I am very thankful for this time of year, when we are reminded to count our blessings and it becomes perfectly natural to be able to show our loved ones how much they mean to us.
I’ve had a year full of gifts, from a wonderful family to amazing, supportive friends, and a rollicking start to a new career, and I am grateful for every one of them.
And thanks to you, all you Goddesses, for opening up Mt. Oly and welcoming us all in. I am thrilled to have had the chance to get to know so many lovely, witty people and share peeks into all of our lives!
Ladytink_534 on 18 Dec 2007 at 11:30 am #
Christmas specials and the ability to visit my family for two whole weeks every December.
ZAMBONIGIRL on 18 Dec 2007 at 11:42 am #
1. my niece, the most beautiful, intelligent 3-year-old in the entire world, and the nap we shared on her birthday. (plus, she pronounces my name “hottie”. smart kid, i’m telling you!)
2. i thought my guinea pig was completely blind, but he can see out of one eye. not well, but enough that he’s finally starting to relax as i let him explore the house. before, everything scared him.
3. my friends, who i can support and be supported by. they’re just a great group of people.
Cookiedough on 18 Dec 2007 at 11:54 am #
I’m very thankful for my family. My eldest sister has breast cancer and she’s almost done treatment. To still have all the siblings together after having both parents passed now, is a quite the blessing.
I’m also very thankful every year for the contact I have with my twin boys I gave up for adoption 20 yrs ago! Their parents are wonderful people to let me in their lives!
RachelG on 18 Dec 2007 at 12:10 pm #
I am grateful that my children don’t fight anymore. All three of them fought like cats and dogs when they were little. It drove me insane. Now that they are all in their twenties, they don’t fight and are actually nice to each other. They don’t know it, but that is the best present they could ever give me. To sit at the Christmas dinner table and not have a fight erupt over a piece of ham, is bliss.
Lisa H on 18 Dec 2007 at 12:15 pm #
I am sooooothankful for my three children. Just three healthy, usually well-behaved loving and warm children who are all gifts and blessings.
Also thankful that my middle child, a son, who switched schools this year is doing fantastic and seems to have a new lease on life.
I am also thankful for my friends who are always THERE.
And for my husband who works so very hard to provide for his family and give all a wonderful Christmas.
Marie Conley on 18 Dec 2007 at 12:19 pm #
Rachel, I’m sure that would be a great gift to my mom, but I don’t see it happening in the near future.
But I think I’ll try at least for one day.
Lisa H on 18 Dec 2007 at 12:35 pm #
Ellen - what you do is amazing! I have a good friend who had two of her children in NICU. The treatment her children received from the doctors and nurses was amazing.
Those who work in the health care field have my utter respect. I can honestly say all the nurses I have ever known or had care for me were amazingly compassionate and caring. What a priveledge it must be to work with such people.
Lisa H on 18 Dec 2007 at 12:36 pm #
Most importantly as a Christian, I am so thankful for the gift of Jesus that God gave the world. This gift that is always with us, always loving us and guiding us is truly the best gift of all.
Not dissing other religions, just what I am grateful for!
Karen Rose on 18 Dec 2007 at 1:09 pm #
So many things to be grateful for!
Ct009 - I had to chuckle at being grateful for those you love making me crazy. I love DH - he is a card, though. I lovingly described him to a mutal friend today as “Beevis and Butthead” meets “Alex Trebek.” He’s so smart and knows so many things, but he’s the first to laugh at an 8th grade joke.
Guess his eighth graders are grateful he’s their teacher, LOL.
Rachel G - I’m not at that point yet. I’m waiting for it, but at 13 and 17, they haven’t reached the point of sibling harmony. I might be waiting a long time.
Sabrina, I’m so happy your son is making gains! That’s fantastic.
And Julia - I wish I could be thankful for the same thing! My book’s on it’s way though.
CT009 - you should give my contemps a try. Especially DIE FOR ME - lots of history in there. Of course, the villain has studied the history to get ways to kill people, but you can’t have everything, you know.
claudia dain on 18 Dec 2007 at 1:48 pm #
What a great post, especially in the midst of getting the gift shopping done and the decorations really completed. It’s so easy to forget what we’re doing it all for!
Family and friends, good health, the memories of Christmases past when all those I’ve loved in my life were still living…so much to be grateful for.
Ellen, my sister was a premature birth way back in the dark ages when they put them in an incubator and hoped for the best. My sister was slowly dying. The medical practice of the time was to not touch the premies for fear of injuring them. My mom, who sat by her incubator for 15 hours a day, demanded the right to hold her, to cuddle her, and against the doctor’s advice, did so. From that point on, my sister thrived. To know love, to be touched…it’s life. It’s as important as food.
Suzanne Enoch on 18 Dec 2007 at 1:50 pm #
I’m thankful every day for my two sweet nephews — I get to play blocks and fly kites, but I don’t have to change poopie diapers.
And I hope I’ll be thankful next year for hitting the NYT short list for the first time. I’m planning ahead. *g*
Karen Rose on 18 Dec 2007 at 1:55 pm #
Claudia - that’s wonderful - gave me goose pimples
Karen Rose on 18 Dec 2007 at 1:56 pm #
You go, Suzie. I respect a woman who plans ahead.
claudia dain on 18 Dec 2007 at 1:57 pm #
Suzanne, while you’re wishing for the NYT short list, preparing to be thankful, add me to that, will ya? I mean, as long as you’re planning what to hope to be thankful for…LOL
Karen Rose on 18 Dec 2007 at 1:57 pm #
CookieD - blessings to your sister.
claudia dain on 18 Dec 2007 at 1:59 pm #
I know, KarenR, it’s a great testament to love, isn’t it? I’ll tell you the whole story sometime.
Sabrina Jeffries on 18 Dec 2007 at 2:14 pm #
RachelG, the children not fighting is a good thing to be grateful for, and rarer than you might think. My brothers and I are in our forties, and we STILL fight from time to time. My poor mom.
Karen Hawkins on 18 Dec 2007 at 3:02 pm #
Oh yeah, siblings fight. I took my kids to Italy for Thanksgiving and there we are, in Venice, absorbing this incredible ambiance — or so I think until I see my 20 year old daughter is quietly stealing candies from my son’s pocket. She was smirking, too, knowing the second he found out, he’d be up in arms.
I don’t know where she got her contentious streak from but it wasn’t me. You guys know me — I NEVER argue. (ahem!)
doglady on 18 Dec 2007 at 3:15 pm #
What a great post and some great blessings in all of our lives! Ellen, you are a walking saint. My BFF is a retired RN who worked in and trained NICU nurses. I don’t know how you do it, but the world is a better place because you do. I am grateful to ALL of the Goddesses for your wonderful books that keep me sane and out of jail. You should ALL be at the TOP of the NYT bestseller list. Frankly some of the books that are depress the HELL out of me! I am grateful for every moment I had with my DH. It was all too brief so you ladies are spot on for being grateful. Treasure every minute and scrapbook it into your heart. Karen H, speaking of a scrapbook moment the daughter stealing the candy in Venice is one of those. Don’t you wish you had a video of it to play over and over? I am grateful for all of my writing buddies - the gals at Passion’s Slaves, the writers I have met online and at conferences who have encouraged me and helped me immensely. I hate my day job, but I am blessed to have
doglady on 18 Dec 2007 at 3:18 pm #
one when so many people don’t. I have a roof over my head, food on the table, good health (for a nearly 50 year old broad)With luck I will parlay this writing gig into something full-time and permanent. I am grateful for every moment of my life because it all else failed I learned something from it all. I am grateful for my family - my Mom, my brothers, their wives and kids. I am grateful for my furry kids. No matter how bad my day is when I come home they look at me as if I am the best thing since sliced bread. Everyone deserves that kind of devotion from somebody. And last but not least, I am grateful for FROS ! And especially for Sunday’s FROS guy! I won’t need firewood all year!
emmiebee on 18 Dec 2007 at 3:21 pm #
What a heart warming post today! I am so grateful that my VW Bug, “Veruca” decided that the car battery could start up one last time this morning, getting me to work on time, and that my Knight In Shining Armor is coming to take it to the mechanic in a few minutes!
I am grateful that my family is happy and healthy, including my parents who are married 36 years today- and still holding hands and skinny-dipping like newlyweds- ha! I am grateful that my Grandma has my parents nearby- we lost Grandpa one year ago today.
And, sorry, Zamboni, your 3 year old niece has to be TIED for the best niece award, because mine is pretty special too- SUCH a Fancy Nancy, that kid!
And, yes, all nurses ROCK- including Veterinary Technicians!!
-Emmiebee
Marie Conley on 18 Dec 2007 at 3:24 pm #
Karen, no never. You argue? No, I won’t believe it.
Karen Rose on 18 Dec 2007 at 3:38 pm #
Ahem, Karen H. I wonder where she got that contentious streak.
Y’all keep ‘em coming! We’re having a bit of a cold snap down here in the Sunshine state - it dipped to the low 50’s last night. Brrr. But your stories are warming my heart. it’s the truth.
Claudia, I’d love to hear your story sometime about your mom and sister. I think I have a way to work something like that into my wip.
Keep ‘em coming!
doglady on 18 Dec 2007 at 3:56 pm #
Emmiebee, I second your blessings on veterinary technicians! I worked as one for five years and it is a tough job. I am truly grateful for the vet techs at my vet’s office because my chihuahua, Frodo, is the WORST patient on earth! He is so awful and it always embarrasses me to take him in because he is so mean! My two male cats are also completely rotten and the vet techs cringe when I bring them in!
Karen, I will see your 50’s in Florida and raise you a 29 degrees this morning in Alabama! BRRRR!
Yes, we all know Karen H is the model or propriety and decorum. (cough, cough, cough, can’t …… breathe …..)
cail on 18 Dec 2007 at 3:58 pm #
i just looked up the pronounciation of viscount… i’ve been reading it wrong for years… oops!
you guys have such great stories, i keep tearing up.
i guess i should say i’m grateful that i’ve been really lucky in life, and that bad stuff keeps avoiding me (even if sometimes its only by a little bit)
Ellen on 18 Dec 2007 at 4:12 pm #
CT009…a few years back I NEVER touched anything but historicals…and then I met Karen Rose at a RWA conference. Just to be polite (I swear), I picked up one of her books. I figured I could read a few chapters and fake it next time I saw her.
The problem was, once I picked it up, I couldn’t put it down. I give you my word that you won’t regret reading “Die For Me.”
Karen Hawkins on 18 Dec 2007 at 4:41 pm #
What’s with all of the people writing in *cough cough* after they agree I’m not contentious? Why I outta give you one of THESE (waves fist), ya fruits!
And yes, bless nurses and veterinary techs, and all of the people who hold our hands (or paws) when we need it most.
Judy F on 18 Dec 2007 at 4:45 pm #
great post everyone.
Its been a rough year for my family. I am grateful for still having my parents. Dads memory isn’t what it used to be and that is sad. Just enjoying being with them.
I love spending time with my nieces and nephew. This year my nieces that live out of town are coming in for the holidays. I can’t wait to see them again.
My biggest joy right now is watching my niece’s little girl grow. She is ten months old and has such a fun personality. She is a treat.
Ellen on 18 Dec 2007 at 4:52 pm #
Whenever Karen H starts getting contentious, we have to just remember to hold her paw. That always calms her down.
ilovetoread on 18 Dec 2007 at 5:15 pm #
Karen Rose, when I see kids with their pants down, I always remember what my MIL said one time at a local mall — would I get in trouble if I helped their pants the rest of the way down? That seems to be where they’re headed anyway?!?
Ellen, not only are you way too funny at times, but you are obviously a wonderful person. I deeply appreciate what you do. If it wasn’t for a particular nurse in NICU, my daughter would not have made it. She started out at 3 lbs. 6 oz. at 26 weeks gestation age and dropped to 1 lb. 14 oz. by 5 weeks of age and the doctors had given her up a 4th time. This NICU nurse was actually a PICU nurse who they asked to watch over her while we rushed to the hospital. She cuddled, rocked and sang to her while giving her a bottle of my milk. She told us that she had prayed for her. We never had to rush back again. She’s now 17 and talking pediatrics for a career choice.
Julia, not totally selfish at all, you were doing this for us, weren’t you?!?
Sabrina, just keep enjoying all the accomplishments of your son! One of my bosses has an autistic son also, and he lets me know when he’s done new things.
Gannon on 18 Dec 2007 at 5:18 pm #
What a great blog, Karen R!
I am grateful for my three children who are healthy and civil to each other…most of the time.
For my family, especially the fact that my parents are coming to the mountains to spend Christmas with us.
For my husband, who after 19 years of marriage still manages to surprise me. Today is the 20th anniversary of our engagement. He took the day off work, spoke to my boss secretly to make sure I’d have the day off too, then took me to the top of the mountain where he popped the question 20 years ago. We had champagne, cheese and fruit, and braved the winds and snow that’s still on the ground! It was so sweet, and I feel blessed to have said ‘yes’ 20 years ago and I would do it all over again!
For all of the wonderful writers, especially the Goddesses, who continue to give us amazing stories to read!
ilovetoread on 18 Dec 2007 at 5:57 pm #
Gannon, you are making me SO jealous!! Congrats on a great catch 20 years ago!!
Karen Rose on 18 Dec 2007 at 6:29 pm #
Awww, my romance writer heart is bursting! That is so sweet for your husband to celebrate like that!
My DH and I were engaged on the steps of the Senate building in DC. I always tease him that there is Secret Service video of us stored in the box in that big warehouse - right between the Ark of the Covenant and the Stargate . I think if we re-created our engagement, we’d draw the attention of some covert group like NSA or CIA or maybe even TSA.
We’re coming up on our 26th anniversary of our first date! And I so very very grateful he’s in my life. Believe or not, before DH, I used to be very shy.
Gannon on 18 Dec 2007 at 7:37 pm #
Karen, I love that you were engaged on the steps of the Senate building! Very cool! And yes, there probably is a video of you somewhere.
Judy F on 18 Dec 2007 at 9:21 pm #
Oh I forgot I thought of you all this morning on the way to work. The car in front of me its bumper sticker said:
Back Off Goddess Driving….
ct009ct on 18 Dec 2007 at 9:26 pm #
If I ever decide to try Non-historical Romance Novels (ie contempararies)
I will read one each of the Goddesses who write them.
Cathy *thinking outside the box*
Marie Conley on 18 Dec 2007 at 9:53 pm #
If they would make the guys stronger in the contemporaries then I would read them, but it is not longer acceptable for men to take an overly protective role. I find this ridiculous. Now more than ever do we need protection from the men in our lives.
Karen Rose on 19 Dec 2007 at 5:46 am #
You go, Cathy!!! Let me know if you try one
I think my guys are very strong, Marie. My women are strong, too. Usually the hero saves the heroine, but occasionally it’s the other way around.
Karen Rose on 19 Dec 2007 at 5:47 am #
Judy - I want one of those bumper stickers!!