Heroine, Go Home!
May 24th 2007
Sabrina JeffriesGoddess Grins
Okay, I had a tough time picking a winner for the contest, since there were so many good ones. But I finally settled on Cail’s—“my hero wouldn’t be thrilled that i’d have to get up at the crack of dawn to treck off to the office to work in ::gasp:: the business world. clearly no place for a lady!” (Cail, e-mail me your address, and I’ll send you the book.) I chose it because quite frankly I think it would pose the most serious problem for all of us. Even the stay-at-home mom goddesses would have trouble convincing a 19th century hero that it’s okay for a woman to drive about town alone getting groceries, etc. He’d probably go along and end up decapitating the first poor check-out clerk who tried to help with our bags!
So maybe the idea of having a hero sleep over isn’t such a great one. But surely we’d be safe having our heroines spend the night, wouldn’t we? I mean, you’d think they’d make the perfect best friends. Then again, I’m not so sure that would work out in reality either.
Here are . . .
Ten Reasons I Don’t Want Any of My Heroines for a Best Friend
I don’t know how to lace or unlace a corset.- My guest room is still only big enough for one or two people. So where would I put the lady’s maid, mother, sisters, governess, lady’s companion, poor relation, bosom-confidante-and-soon-to-be-heroine-of-her-own-story, etc. Heroines come with an even BIGGER entourage than heroes.
- The heroines who are ladies will expect to be waited on, which I’m just not up for.
- The heroines who are the do-it-all nurturing Cinderella types would make me look bad. It’s taken me years to convince my husband that laundry is a sport (shh, don’t tell him I lied).
- I need my sleep—how am I supposed to get it if guys are always serenading the heroine or pounding on the door demanding that she come home?
- Speaking of doors, I can’t afford to have mine replaced every time a hero breaks one down to get to Miss Pheromone.
I do not own a curling iron, either the electric kind or the Regency kind that you heat over a fire.- Those ball gowns take up huge amounts of room, and my closets would never be big enough.
- Speaking of gowns, I don’t want her borrowing my clothes after hers are ripped off by some over-sexed villain (or hero, for that matter). Even if they’d fit her, she’d look way better in them than I do.
Which brings me to the most obvious reason … I just don’t need the competition for my man’s affections. I know he loves me, but having a gorgeous, intelligent, all-put-together heroine wander down to the kitchen in her chemise when he’s getting a late-night snack might be more temptation than even a faithful husband can resist. And who needs that?
So tell me, what about you? How do you feel about heroines? Is there one in any book whom you’d honestly want for a best friend? If so, why? If not, why not?
30 Comments »
30 Responses to “Heroine, Go Home!”
MizMacgyver on 24 May 2007 at 6:00 am #
Heroines are notorious for wanting all of their friends to have heroes too. She would be trying to match make and I don’t have the time to deal with a procession of almost heroes.
KariE on 24 May 2007 at 9:06 am #
I think heroines are great…. in stories. Too much drama for my simple modern day life.
Claudia Dain on 24 May 2007 at 9:12 am #
Oooh, another fun list. You know, really, aren’t we all best friends with a heroine?
I’m the heroine of my own story and I’m perfectly willing to share my jewelry, my clothes, my make-up, and my advice about men with my gorgeous heroine friends.
About the only thing I’m not willing to share is the food off your plate, but you knew that about me and, for a heroine, that’s not bad as foibles go, right?
SuzyQ on 24 May 2007 at 9:14 am #
I don’t do tea - I’m a coffee kind of girl. Oh, and I don’t know how to make scones.
KMB25 on 24 May 2007 at 9:35 am #
I could probably help you with the corset thing…seeing as i’ve had to wear one for these reenactment gigs
I don’t think that I’d make a good best friend for a heroine because I’m not a letter-writer…I just don’t have time and if a heroine were my best friend, she’d get upset that I didn’t keep up my correspondence.
Sabrina, I got the new book yesterday and was up til 4 am last night finishing it–i couldn’t put it down!! Awesome Awesome book!!
~Kim
dbrown3400 on 24 May 2007 at 9:37 am #
I invited one of my Regency “best friend” heroines over for a test run, so to speak. Bel, from The Duke by Gaelen Foley. The obvious reason to me is her strength of character as written into so many heroines. She loved on-line shopping (and sent everything back via UPS ground brown coach), Starbucks Venti vanilla cappuccino and Capris. She decided to wear certain fashions from here only for the duke’s entertainment.
We did a spa day at the Red Door in Manhattan, took in a show and a late supper. I showed her as much of the 21st century as possible in the few days she was allowed in her limited visit. Although impressed, she was as happy to return to her life as I was to stay in mine.
Donna
darkshire007 on 24 May 2007 at 9:41 am #
Heroines are great for a story. Reality is they are too perfect. I get out of bed with my hair sticking straight up in the air and stagger downstairs for coffee; then, if I’m motivated, I make breakfast and get on with my day. Heroines seem to be able to do it all and look beautiful. I would get tired of her by the end of the week, wrap her in a tarp and personally deliver her to the local hero. Let him deal with Miss Perky and Perfect!
ladydawgfan on 24 May 2007 at 9:46 am #
I wouldn’t mind at all having a heroine for a friend, nor would I mind having her spend time with me. I love tea, especially strong Earl Grey, and although I cannot make scones of my own, there is a bakery not too far away that makes them wonderfully. I would also love her matchmaking abilities - what single lady wouldn’t love to be matched with a well-heeled single gentlemen of good standing? Plus, most heroines are highly intelligent and well read. We would have a wonderful time discussing different issues, music, history, even fashions, and neither of us would have to feel uncomfortable about it.
Cail on 24 May 2007 at 9:47 am #
oh Sabrina, I’m so excited! I think this is the first time I’ve ever won anything! I’ll probably send you an email from my old college email address since I can’t access the other here.
Claudia, I completely agree about us being the Heroines of our own stories. and MizMacgyver, if my herione best friend picks out the perfect hero, I’d be willing to sacrifice some time to handle that… after all, haven’t found any worthy ones lately.
Sabrina Jeffries on 24 May 2007 at 10:15 am #
Cail, it looks like you’re on the user list, so I’ll just e-mail you directly.
I thought all our e-mails were on here somewhere, but I guess not.
As for heroines, all joking aside, I think I’d like to have Jessica from Lord of Scoundrels as a best friend. She’s just so sensible. And if I screwed up, she wouldn’t leap to conclusions–she’d try to sort out what was wrong.
Or maybe I’d like one of heroines who turns the dingy castle into a home. I’d be happy to hand over all the cooking to someone else. *G* Except since the way to my husband’s heart really IS through his stomach, that could backfire.
Susan K on 24 May 2007 at 11:00 am #
I don’t know if I’d be able to have a heroine as a best friend. I don’t like tea. I would go absolutely NUTS having to be proper and not say what I was really thinking. I would be a scandal! And they always seem much more stronger than me. I would definitely pale in comparison.
FYI …. I got that part time job at Borders Bookstore that I interviewed for.
Karen Rose on 24 May 2007 at 11:07 am #
I think I’d like to have one of my modern heroines as a best friend, probably Mia Mitchell from COUNT TO TEN. She’s a cop and has a gun and isn’t afraid of much, so all she can handle any of the trouble she’s bound to bring with her. On the other hand, Mia can’t cook and neither can I and my modern heroines have no entourage - no cooks following them around. Sadly, they’re on their own. Mia’s staple is Pop-tarts and although I love them, I think I’d get tired of Pop-tarts pretty dang quick.
For culinary delights, I’d have to go with my heroine Tess Ciccotelli - she’s a goddess in the kitchen.
And congrats on the job, Susan K!
zambonigirl on 24 May 2007 at 11:14 am #
My favorite heroine (Miss Emma Woodhouse) would think me every bit as above her notice as beneath it. Besides, I neither want nor need a scheme to attract a Mr. _____’s attention, nor do I have any riddles to add to Miss Smith’s book.
But at least I have a niece. She can’t fault me for that. And I have money. It’s only poverty which makes celibacy (ha!) contemptible, after all.
Actually, I think I’d like Caroline Bingley for a best friend. She’d know all the gossip, go to all the best parties, invite herself to Pemberley whenever she felt like it, and we could cut up all the people in the neighborhood together. As Elinor Dashwood would say, we would make a very wicked pair.
SuzyQ on 24 May 2007 at 11:21 am #
Susan K - congrats on the job! But by working in a bookstore does that mean you just have to hand over your paycheck to the cashier??? I know that would be me!
epfeiffer1 on 24 May 2007 at 11:33 am #
Well, I just don’t have the patience for a Miss Perky-Perfection or a Miss Suffering-Martyr. The first would drive me nuts (I can’t stand perky) and the second would make me want to kick her arse.
For a friend, give me someone snarky and someone whose life’s goal goes beyond motherhood and a smooth running household. (not that there’s anything wrong with that.)
My two cents.
-b
DebMarlowe on 24 May 2007 at 12:05 pm #
Can I have her housekeeper (jingling keys and all) and her cook instead? Although I think I’d have to sit the cook in front of the Food Network for a few days, because my kids would never eat kippers or that delicacy of delicacies, hog cheeks.
MJ on 24 May 2007 at 12:23 pm #
There’s only room for one Heroine at my house…..that job’s already filled. (-;
Sabrina Jeffries on 24 May 2007 at 1:09 pm #
“Sabrina, I got the new book yesterday and was up til 4 am last night finishing it–i couldn’t put it down!! Awesome Awesome book!!”
Aww, Kim, thanks!! I’m so glad you enjoyed it, although I’m sorry that you lost sleep. Oh wait, no, I’m not!
SusanK, congratulations!!! But I’m with SuzyQ, does this mean you just hand your paycheck over? Because that would be me, for sure.
epfeiffer1, surely there’s a snarky heroine out there SOMEWHERE you could hang out with. Maybe Betsy from MaryJanice Davidson’s Undead series? Of course, since she’s a vampire, that might cause other problems.
Judy on 24 May 2007 at 1:11 pm #
Quite frankly all her hare-brained plans to help the hero out would probably get me arrested.
She’s probably too nice and giving and soft-hearted, I’d totally pale in comparison for who Mother Theresa would be.
We’d definitely bump heads more then the hero and heroine would, because missy, I know who’s right!
And the hero probably wouldn’t like me to be her best friend, I’d make him work way more harder when his hare-brain ideas backfire.
On the other hand, I would definitely want Penelope from Romancing Mr. Bridgerton and Elenor from Sin and Sensibility as best frineds now those girls seem like they’d have me laughing my head off from all that wit, and accept me for who and what I am.
Susan K on 24 May 2007 at 1:47 pm #
Thanks for the congrats guys! Nope, won’t be handing over my paycheck. All money is to go in savings for the wedding. It will be tough but I think of it as a test. And if I fail, well, then I’ll have a lot of great books!
terrio on 24 May 2007 at 1:55 pm #
Simple, I don’t need the competition. The last thing a single woman in her 30s needs is a 20 year old gorgeous, intelligent, witty virgin for a girl friend. Puleaze!
And she’d be appalled that I’m a *divorced* woman. I have enough Catholic guilt without adding to it thankyouverymuch.
RachelG on 24 May 2007 at 5:08 pm #
I think all heroine’s should be someone a reader would want as a friend. Then again, I write contemporaries, so it’s a little different.
rg
foreverdelayed on 24 May 2007 at 5:27 pm #
I share a love of donuts with Stephanie Plum, but I am afraid of what might happen to me if I hand with her too long.
aislingyngaio on 24 May 2007 at 5:40 pm #
I think I would like Alexandra Gallant from Suzie’s Reforming a Rake, cause she’s independant and hardworking (and I probably would use it as an excuse to push my housework to her *evil grin*).
Brandy on 24 May 2007 at 6:25 pm #
I wouldn’t want a historical heroine for a friend. She would be scandalized that I go barefoot almost all year long in my home. She wouldn’t know how to make a snack for herself, because I’m not the maid or the housekeeper. She wouldn’t stay with me anyway, because the heroine always devotes her life to her husband with no time for friends anymore.
MizMacgyver on 24 May 2007 at 6:43 pm #
Cail, I have already had 3 “heroes” and divorced 3, kinda makes me nervous when someone wants to match make LOL.
MizMacgyver on 24 May 2007 at 6:51 pm #
I think I could handle Stephanie Plum as a friend, the ladies at work and I are reading the series IN ORDER and we are up to number 3, anyone want to tell me which one she ends up with or is it still going on?? Her luck with cars matches mine to a T other than I would kill to have that Buick! Hmmm, come to think of it, maybe it would be a problem having her for a friend, I would covet her car and the men in her life, then I would feel bad and go into a depression because I am not as nice a person as I think I am.
MizMacgyver on 24 May 2007 at 6:54 pm #
A good reason I couldn’t have a heroine for a friend is because she would be asking my advice on how to get her hero and well, I would draw a blank since I struck out on the hero finding.
Nicole Jordan on 24 May 2007 at 10:24 pm #
Oh, Sabrina, your reasons are such fun. LOVE these blogs and all the comments.
I can’t top the replies, either, lol.
NicoleJ
TinaLouiseF on 29 May 2007 at 7:54 pm #
Looks like I’m late again.
If I ever get a bigger place to live, I’d consider having a heroine visit. Course she would have to bring her own servents. I don’t cook, make tea or coffee.