Confessions of a Cat Woman
Mar 10th 2007
RachelGOn Writing!
I never wanted a cat. Never thought I was a cat person. Never wanted to be one of those crazy women who talk about their cat. Throughout the years, my children have adopted cats, and while I made sure they were well cared for, I didn’t particularly like them.
Then Annabella appeared on my doorstep and tricked her way into my house a year ago. She arrived on my porch in December, a small, white, bundle of pathetic shivering kitten. I felt bad for her, but I DID NOT WANT A CAT. I told her how much I didn’t want a cat as I took her all over the neighborhood trying to find her real home. Or any home, but she purred and licked my hand and acted like she really loved me. Like I was her savior, and I fell for it. I took her back to my house and made her a bed. I bought her cat food and a three-story condo and took her to the vet to make sure she wasn’t sick. The vet told me that poor Anna has an overbite and an allergy to plastic. As a teen, I wore braces on my teeth for two and a half years, so I could sympathize with her buck-tooth problem. I replaced all the plastic cat dishes with porcelain, and I didn’t let her go outside for months, afraid she had no real cat survival skills.
And she let me think it.
She acted all needy and cuddly and cute. Then when she was certain I wouldn’t kick her back out into the cold, she started acting distant. Like the bad boyfriend from high school. The one who acted as if he liked you a lot . . . then suddenly not so much. The more you hung on and tried to make him love you, the more he ran away and hid when he saw you coming. Not that I put up with that crap from a boy–well, not for long. I had a healthy self-esteem. If he clawed and hissed to get away, I figured he was unworthy and I generally let him go. So why am I forcing my love and affection on an unworthy cat? A feline I have to hold tight so she can’t get away? And how did I became a cat person?
Are you too suffering from the unrequited love of a cat, dog or indifferent goldfish? Or does your boyfriend run away at the sound of your voice?
23 Comments »
23 Responses to “Confessions of a Cat Woman”
DebMarlowe on 10 Mar 2007 at 11:06 am #
My cat loves me deeply–mostly because she thinks I’m the only one in the house who can work the can opener.
She tells me how much she loves me every morning, loudly and with much purring and leg rubbing as I’m fixing her breakfast. She has a set routine. When she’s done eating she goes straight to my youngest and deigns to sit and cuddle with him for 10 to 20 minutes, then it’s off to sleep all this exertion off, and we are all pretty much ignored for the rest of the day–until she wants to go outside.
She does occasionally honor us by allowing us to throw her furry mouse for her. When she is feeling particularly benevolent she will actually bring back a mole as an offering and leave it lovingly on the mat.
Yes, we are all aware of our great and good fortune.
FilmPhan on 10 Mar 2007 at 12:57 pm #
I wish that my cat was like that. I love the little bugger but he doesn’t care a fig about me. Now my dogs are different. They are very loving and want their tummies rubbed all the time. They are the sweethearts.
Karen Hawkins on 10 Mar 2007 at 1:00 pm #
Oh Rachel, I know where you’re coming from. I have a cat who hates me … but she’s SO CUTE!!! She actually likes my bf better than me and will actually rub against him. But s’ok cause every once in a while, she’ll come back and need a scratch. Guess who’s her best friend THEN?
As for men … there was this guy in college and if I ran into him and he didn’t pay any attention to me, I’d HAVE to see him and I’d make a fool of mysel doing so. Then, if he saw me somewhere and I didn’t pay any attention to him, he’d make a fool of himself trying to see me. It was a very odd, hot/cold relationship and I’m sorta glad it never went anywhere. As if it could.
gannon on 10 Mar 2007 at 1:14 pm #
Our cat is a TOTAL people cat–loves everyone! He’s constantly in search of a new lap to sit on, so he can rev up his purring machine! We all love him, even my husband, who has never been a cat person.
Judy F on 10 Mar 2007 at 2:21 pm #
My first cat Dusty only loved me. Was very protective and would growl and take a swing at anyone who dared to come into her home. I miss her a lot. She would snuggle with me all the time she was a great nurse when I was sick.
Now my Sammy on the other hand, is only loving when it suits him. Very seldom likes to sit on my lap unless I am on the computer. He hides at the hint of anyone coming in my apartment. LOL He is very sweet and vocal esp in the morning when its FEED ME time. God forbid I want to sleep in. But I wouldn’t trade him for the world. He also loves to play fetch. Its funny seeing a cat run off after the rings off milk cartons and he brings them back to me.
My sister has a dog I just adore. She is so happy to see you even if you only just walked outside. She brings you toys to play with her. I tell ya if I could get greeted like that every day when I get home from work, life would be great.
claudia dain on 10 Mar 2007 at 2:33 pm #
I’ve had great luck with cats, at least cats of a certain coloration. My theory, which my vet supports, is that the personality of a cat is highly predicted by coloration.
Orange tiger cats are adorable, but they wander and tend to die in their adventures.
Tabby and white are the best for companionship and affection and they live forever.
Black cats run hot and cold on the affection meter, but are sweet nonetheless.
Calico (which is all my grandmother ever had) are highly trainable and loyal, but not very affectionate.
White cats are standoffish and have that typical cat superiority complex.
Annabella looks like a mostly white cat with just a hint of tabby—which would explain her personality. If we go with this “explanation” then you’re off the hook! She gave you all she could, Rachel. It’s not your fault that she can’t love you any better than she does.
The real question is: does this theory work with boyfriends?
Personally, I never had much luck with redheads. The most loyal boyfriends were always brunettes, but the quickest to commit were blonds.
RachelG on 10 Mar 2007 at 2:55 pm #
Very interesting Claudia. I had never heard that coloration theory before. Yeah, Anna is mostly white with a tabby face and tail. With her weird fur combo, her buck-teeth and the hair loss she gets if she touches plastic, you’d think she wouldn’t be so stuck up.
I never had luck with red haired boyfriends either, but looking back, that was a good thing. The freakiest guys I dated were all blonde.
Nicole Jordan on 10 Mar 2007 at 3:59 pm #
What a darling kitty, Rachel! It’s really too bad her Cat-snob gene is so dominant. But maybe she’ll get cuddlier as she matures. If she’s only 1 yo now, she may be going through her teen years.
I’m not a cat-person either, but when I’m around them, I much perfer cats that act like dogs.
As for boyfiends, I can’t relate very well cause I never had many when I was growng up, so I’ll leave it to you to dish on the juicy details!
NicoleJ
dbrown3400 on 10 Mar 2007 at 4:26 pm #
I wasn’t a cat person either until I had one. We never had pets at home growing up but my first husband introduced two orange cats into our house (it was never a home) right away. Is orange cat a breed? For whatever reason I bonded with those cats, fed them, etc., but they stayed with the ex after the divorce because he would have perished wo those animals. He told me he would be nothing without me either and I replied, “What else is new?”
My second husband and I found a stray Silver Tabby that was beautiful. I was her best friend. We named her Quincy and she fit in well with our Miniature Schnauzer after a painful breaking in period. She ran to the kitchen at the sound of the can opener regardless of operator, but come bedtime, she and Spritz found their way on top of me to sleep. They weren’t there when I went to sleep but I woke up each morning wondering why I was totally paralyzed. Quincy was on my chest and Spritzie down between my ankles. Our daughters had beds and our bed was a king. Go figure. I still think about Spritzie and Quincy although they’ve been gone a long time.
Donna
Karen Hawkins on 10 Mar 2007 at 6:39 pm #
I tend to like cats better … but Claudia, I must say your colorization theory intrigues me.
We had an orange cat who was exactly the way you describe — adorable but died in a horrible adventure. Wasn’t afraid of any dogs and thought everyone was his friend.
Hmmm … does my cat only love me as much as she ‘can?’ Or as much as she ‘wants’ to love me? She’s a tabby with some white — and she DOES adore my bf. Just … not me.
Perhaps I have an anti-cat gene. I’m still thinking it could be me.
Julia London on 10 Mar 2007 at 6:54 pm #
Cannot relate. Have two canines that follow me everywhere, desperate for my affection. Would trade them for a cat in a heartbeat if anyone would take them!
Suzanne Enoch on 10 Mar 2007 at 7:29 pm #
I’m a dog and fish and bird person — all stereotypical enemies of cats.
I like an animal that either can’t attack you or lets you know when he’s happy or angry. I like my men the same way. *g*
claudia dain on 10 Mar 2007 at 7:40 pm #
I’m a dog and cat person and have always had both. The dogs accept the cats as part of the pack and the cats train the dogs to ‘behave’. I’ve never seen a better dog trainer than a cat!
Brandy on 10 Mar 2007 at 8:04 pm #
I love my fur-babies (kitties). Somehow we now have 7. But, my all time favorite is my Layla who looks amazingly like your kitty! I love her blue eyes and have raised her since she was a few days old, as her mother abandoned her. She follows me everywhere, sleeps with me (she’s a bed hog!) and finds my lap everytime I sit down. HOWEVER, after being petted for more than 10 minutes, or if I stop petting her, she gets upset and won’t let me touch her. WHILE SHE’S ON MY LAP! My hubs says she can go from loving to witch in 3.2 seconds. *g* Oh, adn she doesn’t like my Daughter to pet her, but lets my Son and she puts up with the hubs.
I like the color theory posted above.
Sabrina Jeffries on 10 Mar 2007 at 8:21 pm #
I’m a cat person, though I don’t have one, because neither my hubby nor my son could tolerate it. I grew up with cats, dogs, guinea pigs . . . whatever pet my parents could tolerate. I LOVED our cat the best (Thomasina). Then during the summer between my college and grad school, I had my own cat (Erica), a very atypical cat who wanted to play with me ALL the time. A very affectionate, boisterous cat. Unfortunately, I discovered after I got her that I was not allowed to have a pet in the grad student housing, so I had to give her away. Sigh. That’s the last cat I had. Now I just enjoy other people’s cats.
I do think I put off some vibe that cats like. Most cats seek me out. If I go to a friend’s house, and said friend has a cat “who doesn’t like strangers,” the cat generally goes right to me and shocks the friend. This has happened with several cats belonging to several friends. Makes me wonder if I smell like catnip or something.
Dogs are okay, but they’re just a little too enthusiastic and need a little too much love for me.
Karen Hawkins on 10 Mar 2007 at 9:09 pm #
We had the cat first, and then got a dog from a rescue place. He’s a huge LBD — Large Brown Dog. And he’d never lived in a house with a cat before. But somehow they got along well from the first day. My cat thinks she owns the world and she just dominates him. He’ll even let her drink from his bowl! I’ve never seen anything like it.
The funniest thing, though, is when he wags his tail and slaps her in the face without knowing it. She gets such a DISGUSTED look on her face and will bat at his tail like crazy. But it’s a very fluffy tail and he never notices her efforts. Or at least he PRETENDS not to notice!
KMB25 on 10 Mar 2007 at 10:36 pm #
I am such a cat person! I grew up with cats and a dog in our small home and while I love both…with my crazy musician lifestyle, cats are definitely easier to take care of. One problem? The husband’s allergic…ughhhh. So my kitty had to go live with my mom about a year and a half ago and I miss her sooooo much!
~Kim
KMB25 on 10 Mar 2007 at 10:41 pm #
Julia,
I’d take on your dogs! Now, I just have to convince my husband…and can we work it where I’d get some free books to read in this deal??????
I can see myself lounging in an armchair, reading all day long…with the doggies all around me
That’s definitely a job I’d consider…hehe.
Speaking of jobs…is that a real one? You know how they have people to test video games?? Do they have people who read your books first to test them?….I’d certainly volunteer. And where do I send my resume?? (this is definitely wishful thinking on my part I’m sure!)
~Kim
Julia London on 11 Mar 2007 at 11:48 am #
Kim, you don’t know my dogs. They are labs, so they always have a lovable face, BUT…they are old. Maude is very bitchy and Hugo is very deaf. And they stink. Just seems to be an old dog stink. And they are fairly worthless–they can’t even be bothered to fetch a chew stick. They have long since stopped barking at people who come to the door, and pretty much exist to lie on my feet. Oh, and did I mention that geriatric dog medicine is very expensive?
Okay, I love my dogs and don’t really want to get rid of them. But I am reading with envy the cat tales here. How lovely to have an animal who doesn’t trip you in their clinginess. How wonderful to be completely ignored by the animal population. SIGH….
Test readers? I think they are called agents, LOL!
MizMacgyver on 11 Mar 2007 at 7:16 pm #
I love my cats, all three of them. Used to have 4 but I lost one, cried for a week. The first and oldest is Pounce, he is a “Tuxedo” Cat, you know, the white chest and paws and everything else black. He is the “untouchable” until he wants something you have, for example, a hamburger. He has on more than one occasion brought me presents! Refer to Deb Marlowe post, he also brings birds, mice, and anything else he can catch, even a Blue Jay one time, and they are very mean birds. Next came Angel, who isn’t an angel by any stretch of the imagination but she is the ultimate lap cat, if I sit down and make a lap, she is in it. She is a calico, little patches of all kinds of colors, white, gray, peachy. She was apparently taken from her momma too soon because she tries to nurse on my clothing while she is sitting on my lap. This is uncomfortable as she does the bread kneading thing plus leaving little wet spots on my clothes. And finally our beloved Alpha Male Slate, he is solid gray with pale yellow eyes, he is already bigger than Pounce and is 3 years younger, I don’t even know what I am going to do when he grows up, I think he may be a throw back to a panther. He has decided he will be my son’s cat, unless my son is not available for consultation and adoration sessions, then he is my cat, however I already have a lap full of female cat and she takes great exception to the “Alpha Male” attitude. I have taken to keeping a dixie cup of water by me at all times, what happens when I am not home, you may ask? Well we have broken fans, lamps, laundry hamper (I don’t know how they did it and I am quite sure I don’t want to), two tables (well they were old ::sigh::), an assortment of figurines ( they are now boxed up until I figure out if it is possible to train cats), and one DVD player that they managed to push off the top of my son’s tv. Yeah, exciting household, even when I am not present. I managed to raise two kids and until they moved, my granddaughter, and never, ever, child-proofed a house, didn’t have to, the kids behaved way, way better than the cats. I have to go now and change my shirt, Angel and Slate just had a disagreement and my shirt is very, very wet!!!
Haven Rich on 11 Mar 2007 at 11:28 pm #
I have seven cats! Some of them prefer my husband more than me, and others prefer me over him. Honestly, the color coding doesn’t really work with them.
Here are their moods and preference:
Spike (black/white aka tux) ~ Very lovable, and very much my cat. He is very jealous of my husband and gets cranky if my husband has touched me in any way. If I’m sick, he’s on my lap. If I go into the hospital, he’s looking out the window waiting on me. Needless to say, either he worships me or he enjoys the way I worship him. The two things that irk him: Being held and my husband kissing him.
Amie (tortoiseshell aka black calico) ~ She is the queen, and if you disagree, you are not loved. If you don’t pet her right, she will ignore you. However, if you are standing or walking around and holding her, she is one happy queen. She is more my cat than my husbands. Amie demands respect! Dislikes: Toes are a “no touchie” zone. Her tummy is sometimes off limits as well.
Shadow (solid black) ~ He is our organizer. If the (any of them) food bowls are low, he lets us know. If the water is getting low, he tells us. He loves giving nibble kisses but HATES being picked up or overly cluttered. I think he suffers from claustrophobia. Shadow is also a big chicken. He is afraid of other people (aside from hubby and I). He belongs to both of us.
Star (brown tabby) ~ Two words: Daddy’s girl! She’s very lovable and loves sleeping on his chest. She doesn’t mind most everything, except a bath. Bath=pits of hell! She turns into a very evil cat after a bath. She’ll attack the others, as if blaming them. A few days later, she’s back to her sweet self. Needless to say, we do a waterless bath for her.
Angel (gray tabby) ~ She had two sides (think Angel from Buffy, with and without a soul). She was mean when she was a “teen” cat. Once we had her fixed she became a much nicer cat. Very loving and bossy in her loving. If you aren’t showing her attention, she’s lifting your hand to get it. She hates not being center of attention. Angel belongs to my husband more.
Wendy (white/black..more white) ~ Wendy is a blond. Dory from Finding Nemo has more brains! She loves doing the “happy dance” when petted, but hates being picked up or cuddled too close. She loves the hubby.
Demon Child (gray tabby) ~ This child is evil, hence his name. He was feral when we got him and has slowly accepted he has humans to boss around now. When we first got him, he wasn’t afraid to smack you or bit you in the fact. A few times he did this at night, while we were sleeping. Now he is a mellow (more so anyhow) guy. He’s the husband’s cat. Demon really doesn’t like his feet touched. He sits in your arms like a baby would, which is too funny!
So now I totally sound like one of those freak cat-ladies, I’ll admit that I’ve never really had a b/f do the run and hiding thing. I normally found the guys that didn’t know how to turn lose. Can we say stalker?
BTW right now I’m so glad I married a guy who loves cats as much as I do.
Susan K on 12 Mar 2007 at 12:36 pm #
I’ve never had cats. Both my mom and my fiance are allergic to them so I will never have one. I do have a dog that my mom and I share custody off. He’s a very spoiled Norwegian Elkhound. He is the baby and knows it! I usually take him every other weekend. Now he used to love me and be excited to see me UNTIL he met my fiance. Now I might as well not exist. Oh he’ll come to me when he’s hungry, has to go out or wants his treats but other than that he only wants Tim.
Once I brought him to my apartment. He went in looked in the living room, then the dining room, and finally into the bedroom. Soon he comes out and looks at me accusingly and I know he’s thinking: “Where is Tim? What did you do with him?”
Selfish Addict on 26 Mar 2007 at 9:34 pm #
I’vealways liked cats but,grew up with dogs. Can’t stand home without them. Mine are my kids. In Nov. we got a dachsund and 2wks. later got 2 poodles. Same breeder. Dachsund is jealous of the poodles so now sleeps with us. My Mom calls me the pied-piper. Where ever I go I have a following of 3. They all like the rest of family but,when I’m home I’m it. I’m the world for them and I love it. Dach.is 11mos.poodles 6mos.they really are babies and after Katrina I NEEDED them. All have a blanky even.