Deer in the Headlights
Mar 4th 2007
Suzanne EnochWhen Goddesses Fall To Earth
I hate pictures of myself.
It never fails, at every family gathering, holiday, or trip to the park with my nephews, I end up in some photo or other. And every time I do, I look like a deer in the headlights.
I mean, I don’t expect to turn out looking like a super model; I KNOW I’m not one of those. But human would be good. Normal human would be better. But no, in every photo I have a huge, protruding face and squinty eyes, and I look . . . scared.
And so, knowing that the picture’s going to turn out looking icky, I pose. I suppose I figure, hey, if I’m going to look goofy, I may as well look like I’m being goofy on purpose. Right?
Oh, wait, this is Karen Hawkins, at the Georgia Aquarium last year. She looks good, even with a fish halo. Hi, Karen.
See, this is a great example. Here’s me, on the same day. 
Hm. Deer in the headlights. Cerva acus eminentia (okay, yes, that’s a very rough Latin translation).
I like to take pictures, and at times have resorted to taking them of myself just to prove that I actually was someplace 
(my sister and me at the Tower of London). Those, I expect to look jut-chinned and a little crazy-eyed. And then there are the ones when I try to look natural, and I either look like I’m in a stupor or a maniacal axe-wielding freak.
Once I asked my sister to take some pictures of me for a publicity thing. I sat out in my garden amid my flowers, and I did this cute head tilt thing that made me look very coquetish – in my mind, anyway. My sister finally asked me what the hell was wrong with my neck, because I looked like I needed a chiropractor. Sigh.
I have to say, at my publisher’s request I did once sit for a professional photo shoot. I spent the entire session in dread, trying to look happy and not like Freddie Krueger. To my surprise, several of the photos turned out looking okay. Pretty good, even. (See the photo by my name, above.) I could say that out of three hundred pictures, a dozen of them were bound to end up looking acceptable, but I don’t think that’s what it was. I mean, I have to give credit to the photographer. He obviously worked some sort of miracle. Maybe sacrificed a chicken to Photogenia, the Goddess of Looking Good on Film.
So what kind of photos do you tend to take? Are you photogenic, or frightful? And for crying out loud, does anybody have any hints about how to look natural and you know, normal, in front of the camera?
28 Comments »
28 Responses to “Deer in the Headlights”
diamondlil on 04 Mar 2007 at 2:11 am #
I run away from the camera. Whenever I see a picture of me I think “Woah, is that how OTHER people see me!”.
Recently, a family member was looking for photos of everyone to make a card, and she came up to me and said that she could not find any of me…I was very happy with that! She wasn’t as pleased! Then again, she does the same thing so she couldn’t really say much.
Keri Ford on 04 Mar 2007 at 9:20 am #
I worked for a professional photographer for several months, and it seemed every time somebody would TRY to pose, that’s when they’d mess up. You know, doing the head tilt thing your sister accused you of and attempting to ‘smile’ with their eyes. Instead of some fabulous shot like they’re expecting, they end up looking like they’ve got a broken neck and crossed eyes.
Pro-photographers get the good shots (I think), because the ‘non-photogenic models’ come in dreading their appointment. They’re tired, they don’t feel like messing with it, and don’t expect anything good to come of it. Usually, this will bring negative remarks from the ‘model’ about the whole thing, which turns into jokes with you actually laughing (meaning, not attempting that fake laugh which awards a fake smile), and VOLIA! You have a great photograph of yourself the photographer snapped of you being you!
Julia London on 04 Mar 2007 at 10:49 am #
I think the only way I’d look great in photos is to lose 20 pounds, 20 years, and about 20 “freckles.”
Maria Duncan on 04 Mar 2007 at 11:30 am #
I live in fear of photos of myself, I always end up with a jutting chin and a weird smile. When someone is taking a picture of me my smile gets all shaky, i cannot get it to seem natural. And isn’t the camera phone the worst invention ever?
Sabrina Jeffries on 04 Mar 2007 at 12:08 pm #
Keri, the whole “make them laugh” thing doesn’t work for me. I have a rather . . . er . . . unattractive natural laugh. My whole mouth opens and I look like I’m about to eat a fly. My publicity photo was taken by a professional photographer friend of mine, and he kept making me laugh. We couldn’t use about half of the pictures because my mouth was open or my smile was too broad. I always have to tone things down for pictures.
Suzanne Enoch on 04 Mar 2007 at 1:28 pm #
Keri, I think you explained why I had a couple of decent photos during that sitting. I kept saying “how freaky do I look?” and he’d give me levels, like Jeffrey Daumer or Attila the Hun, so I’d laugh. But man, I’d like the secret to appearing normal when non-professional snap a photo of me.
Karen on 04 Mar 2007 at 2:48 pm #
Suzanne - I live in fear of having my picture taken but so many were taken last summer by my ten year old granddaughter, that I’ve said “What the heck!” You only go around once and she loves me so I let her take her pics of her favorite grandmother..Love is Wonderful, especially from a ten year old. I must tell you though that I just love your pics…I think this woman is content with her life and I want to be like her when I grow up not that you are probably all grown up either. Karen in PA
kimber on 04 Mar 2007 at 4:14 pm #
I absolutly cannot stand to have my picture taken. It drives me nuts. I can’t get my jaw to look not hideous. My eyes are closed in half of the pictures and when I stand up straight I tend to throw my sholders back so I look like I’m posing for a muscle beach photo. I wish I could carry it off, unfortunatly I just look rediculous. Sigh, oh well. Every photo that I have seen of myself that I liked was taken when I was not “posing” for them. Of course then the people around me in those tend to be making some face or other so I can’t use those pics either. Deer in the headlights, thats me as soon as I see a camera. Then I run for cover. Lol
Terry Jo on 04 Mar 2007 at 7:04 pm #
I hate having my picture taken also, very rarely do I let anyone take a picture. I end up looking like I’m stoned or coming off of a three day drunk! I blink. Whenever the flash goes off, I blink. It never fails and it never makes for a good picture.
MizMacgyver on 04 Mar 2007 at 8:00 pm #
I avoid a camera like the plague, once upon a time I didn’t look so bad as long as I wasn’t laughing, but it doesn’t matter now, I never take a good picture.
KMB25 on 04 Mar 2007 at 8:33 pm #
I’ve never felt like I take good pictures…I wish I did though. I always want my pictures to look like those that are in magazines…though they never do…ughhh.
I’ve had to do some photo shoots with bands for publicity and magazine stuff and (I wish I could upload the awful pic so y’all could see it) but it looked like a cheesy-demented redneck band/family picture. The pic that I was sent by the photographer made me look like I had two bad (or black) teeth in the wrong light and the others looked just as bad….it was weird though…when it went to print…it really doesn’t look so bad in the magazine (It was published in Christian Living Magazine in March of last year…don’t ask). Although it still looks cheesy to me…but I suppose that’s another issue altogether.
I think that we’re also always more critical when it comes to ourselves…hence the reason why someone told me that you should never be the one choosing your own pictures when it’s for publicity.
~Kim
froggie on 04 Mar 2007 at 8:46 pm #
I hate seeing myself in any picture. I never think I look good, not matter how others praise the result. Looking at myself just makes me feel uncomfortable… I avoid cameras like the plague!
Isabel on 04 Mar 2007 at 10:32 pm #
I, too, avoid cameras like the plague. I just can’t have one good picture! lol
Suzanne Enoch on 04 Mar 2007 at 10:35 pm #
It’s funny how many of us don’t like our own photos. I wonder sometimes if George Clooney or Keira Knightly like the way they look in photos, or if it’s a universal thing.
Brandy on 04 Mar 2007 at 11:31 pm #
When at family gatherings and there are pictures taken, I hide behind my husband. He’s 6ft, and I’m……not. So, it’s not hard! I absolutely detest photos of myself and get out of it by taking all the pictures of everyone else.
Karen Rose on 05 Mar 2007 at 5:04 am #
I hate my pictures. I don’t like to smile in my photo, because I just don’t look good, in my humble opinion. When my publicity pix were taken (blessings to miracle-worker-Tara Kearney), I did the serious-sober-suspense-author face. Then my husband shows up, stands behind Tara and begins to do all the dirty signs in sign language (we sign at home).
I started to laugh. He always makes me laugh, that’s why I love him. BUT NOT when the photographer is snapping pic after pic. Of course the “smiley” one is the photo my editor and agent liked the best. I convinced them that for the back cover of my book, the serious-sober-suspense face was best (whew!), but they always give that one out when I’m making an appearance or something. Curses!
Karen Hawkins on 05 Mar 2007 at 9:13 am #
Suzanne, you SAY you take bad photos, but you LOOK great in all of the ones I’ve taken of you!
I HATE having a camera pointed at me. I freeze up. Get a very startled look on my face. And KNOW I’m going to hate the pic when it’s done.
Hmmm. Self fulfilling prophecy perhaps? I think so.
Brandy, I need a Shield Man like you have! I could just duck and hide and viola! No problem!!!
Susan K on 05 Mar 2007 at 9:33 am #
I detest having my picture taken. I always try to hide behind someone. And when I absolutely cannot avoid it I always feel as if my smile is fake. Ugh pictures are evil!
RachelG on 05 Mar 2007 at 11:13 am #
I just had new publicity photos taken, and I always hate every minute of it. The poor photographer took 280 pics and only a handful turned out okay. I often wonder if it’s the photos that are bad, or if I just live under the delusion that I am actually better looking in real life.
Daisy W on 05 Mar 2007 at 1:15 pm #
I found the easiest way to keep from having your picture taken is to always be the one taking the pictures. Not even the best professionals can get a good picture of me, thanks to my glasses. I have really thick special lenes that REALLY mess with the lights, so there is either a weird glare on them or my head is tilted at some wierd unnatural painful angle. I have really pale skin, so I look like a ghost in pictures, especially with two brightly glowing spots where my eyes should be on my glasses.
TheNightPoet on 05 Mar 2007 at 1:29 pm #
‘looks sheepishly around’ I’m one of those people that has a great driver’s license picture. I don’t know how I do it, considering when I go in there to renew my license, the people flash the thing so fast you don’t even realize they’re doing it until it’s over. The best I can tell you is that I just think of it as a picture that someone I know (ie. a friend, family member, etc.) is taking. I’m a photogenic person and love to pose for the camera. I just try to be natural when someone wants to take my picture. Although one of my friends has recently taken up the fun of catching our friends and myself at points when we’re not ready for the camera to be on us. Because of her, I have recently had some somewhat bad pictures taken of me. She says that she likes getting the random pictures that show actual everyday life. (ie. getting out of a car, brushing your hair, etc.) I will admit that some of the pictures have turned out good and pretty cool looking, but others we just tell her to burn. lol Be glad she and her camera haven’t found you guys yet!
Andrea
rumolay on 05 Mar 2007 at 5:19 pm #
I look awful in about 85% of the pictures taken of me. I’m not a huge fan of having my picture taken, but since I went ahead and married a photographer, it is now my lot in life. At least he manages to make me look pretty decent. However, photogenic, I’ll never be.
And, like you, I also do the self-portrait thing, which is never a good idea, really. But I keep trying, thinking that someday, I’m bound to get a good shot.
Then there is my step-father, who insists on taking photos at every family gathering, usually while we are sitting at the table, eating. I look bad enough in photos, but when they are taken while I’m chewing a full mouth of food, the results are disastrous!
Bridget Waters on 05 Mar 2007 at 9:34 pm #
I never let people take pictures of me, I always take pictures of myself so If they are hideous then I can delete them.
I don’t like smiling much in pictures either because it makes my cheeks really puffy looking also.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v145/dcichicano1/g1-1.jpg
^That’s one of my better pictures
Claudia on 05 Mar 2007 at 10:18 pm #
Perhaps this advice comes a bit late, but I’d say that the secret to a good photo is to RELAX. The best photos are unposed, but if pose you must, then: Stand up straight, and stick your chin out a tiny bit (I know it sounds silly but it tends to work). Then take a deep breath and slowly exhale, and smile as you do so. That way your face –that is, cheeks and jawline–is defined but you don’t look tense.
Claudia on 05 Mar 2007 at 10:29 pm #
Ha, one of these is posed and the other spontaneous–Guess which is which?
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v636/Nox7/Xanga%20Stuff/Smile.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v636/Nox7/484119162_l1.jpg
dbrown3400 on 05 Mar 2007 at 11:39 pm #
I don’t mind having my picture taken especially if I try to forget that’s what I’m doing. A few shots have come out okay over the years. I’m with TheNightPoet and the driver’s license photo. I’m going to insist that Motor Vehicles paste my statistics around my current photo until they no longer allow me to drive.
Donna
Nicole Jordan on 06 Mar 2007 at 9:34 am #
Eeek, I hate having my pic taken too. Cause I’m never as good-looking as I hope I’ll be. Keri, I laughed out loud at your description of what posers do to get the “smiling eyes.” That is so true in my case. Someone once told me I looked like Princess Di when I had my head down and was looking up with my eyes, so I tried that the next time somebody snapped my pic. “Contorted” is the kindest way to describe the effect.
NicoleJ
darkshire007 on 21 May 2007 at 11:52 pm #
It’s all in the light. I look terrible in pictures taken in artificial light! But the same photos taken outside in natural light turn out really well. I think artificial light washes out most people and makes them look like they are posing for corpses r’ us.